Sunday, January 12, 2014

Ode to ants

Oh ants,
if it were not for the fact that you are part of God's incredible creation,
His finely-tuned ecosystem,
and that God upholds you in Scripture as an example of hard work
--presumably for your ability to invade precious treats brought over from America,
every dish left for more than ten minutes, and some less,
and to run over my body so many moments during the day in your endeavors for food--
I would be delighted if you vanished from the earth.
your swiftness, ingenuity, prolific nature, constant presence, and persistence
amaze and thoroughly disgust me.
If I go into my kitchen, you are there;
if I go into the depths of my school room, you are there.
In my bedroom and bathroom, you are there.

As it is, I am trusting that God has good reasons why you so thoroughly infest my house
in such a surprising, embarrassing, and skin-crawling variety of species.
Thank you for increasing my faith in God's masterful plan
and my perseverance as I try to annihilate all of you residing in my home
without compromising my principles of good character.

May the best woman win.

5 comments:

Ruthie H. said...

I think there's a Borax "recipe" my missionary friends use here for killing ants. Wishing you success in the war. :)

John and Janel Breitenstein said...

Great to hear from you again, Ruthie! I think I have heard something like that--Borax mixed with jelly--but I haven't been able to find Borax lately. Where do you get yours? Best method right now is a spray of water with peppermint and cinnamon oil. We'll see... :)

Amanda B. said...

AMEN! Ohmygoodness the ants! Tiny ones, medium ones, HUGE ones with pinchers… gross, gross gross! I would share my toilet story about ants, but I'm afraid it's too graphic. :-/

John and Janel Breitenstein said...

Amanda, I knew you would be able to commiserate...good grief. Where do they come from?!

Ruthie H. said...

Hmmm...I think they had to bring the Borax, which isn't much help to you right now. If I hear of other solutions, I will be sure and pass 'em on. :)