Breit Spot

What I'm thankful for, Part II

2012-02-18T12:18:00.000-08:00

This week, around day three or so without power and with ants seriously waging war on my kitchen, I was struggling to persevere and be grateful. A friend had very thoughtfully offered to take me grocery shopping since we aren't in possession of our vehicle yet. We actually got talking about she and her husband's life in Sudan before they came here. It was 120 degree heat, usually. Their little kids were often sick whether because of water filtration problems or food contamination. There weren't really any vehicles... So many things sounded so much more challenging than my fridge that was essentially an expensive cooler sitting in my kitchen.

I do realize that sitting next to the guy with his leg cut off doesn't mean having your finger cut off doesn't hurt. It's important to speak truth about what we're going through, and to fully realize God's compassion on our circumstances; I believe that truth helps us to "walk in the light as He is in the light." That morning a Psalm someone had stuck in our suitcases reminded me that David prays, "Give ear, O Lord, to my sighing..."

But a little perspective certainly helps the ol' gratitude factor. Slowly, God is replacing my complaining with thankfulness.

Culture shock is like...

2012-02-18T11:59:00.000-08:00

I’m realizing that with a lot of my culturally-related frustrations or rather alarming experiences, I deal with them reasonably well in the moment. Well enough, in fact, that I may not actually realize how frustrating they actually are to me. Then at the end of the day, I might, say, burst into tears. Or snap unreasonably at a small child who perhaps had a very reasonable request. Or struggle to keep my eyes open once I sink into a chair. I think, why in the world am I behaving this way?

My mind responds, Well, it could be that. Oh. Yeah. And it was definitely a little of that. And what about that? As my mom would say, it’s a little like being pecked to death by a duck.

Thankful for new mercies every morning that are just right for that day.

What I'm thankful for

2012-02-18T11:55:00.000-08:00

I am immensely enjoying electricity after a week of only about twelve hours of it. God's really working on my gratitude and perseverance (hmm. And my perspective). Thankful I won't have to throw out any milk in the morning!

The painters

2012-02-18T11:54:00.000-08:00

Often when you move into a house here, it’s painted. John and I certainly didn’t mind this. Our house was kind of a light salmon, from the pictures. Hmm. So we decided to go with yellow on the outside, like our house in Little Rock. (That one used to be olive green, and we couldn’t believe how much more we liked it and wanted to care for it when it was a color other than baby food.) We were a little surprised, then, when our new abode was painted orange. We’re still not entirely sure what went wrong, but lesson learned: There can be a lot of communication problems even when both parties speak English. We were a little more surprised when walking around the house, we discovered that the other side was kind of a vibrant pastel peach. Hmm. At last, we are satisfied with the entire house being one color of orange. Sure, there was a swipe of it on the white garage door and a lot of drips on the brick that no one thought to wipe off. Sure, when they touched up the trim, they used a different color of paint. But you know, there are worse things.

On the inside, we offered to pay the difference between painting the house economy white and painting it colors that we’d picked out. In fact, we altered the colors we’d originally chosen upon the advice that we choose something darker than the color of red Ugandan dirt. (John’s mom is rumored to have gone into a carpet store once with a bag of dirt, saying, “I’d like something this color.) This has paid off. Now only the floors show the dirt, not the walls! Progress.

In Uganda, friends and connections are very important, so the painters were selected for us. Kindly, they decided to give us a little extra: on the trim, my cupboards, the ceiling, the tile. When they asked for more money to buy more paint, later I had the inappropriate little thought that they might take some of the paint from those locations.

Yet to their credit, they did attempt to remove some of the paint from the trim. Uh, some of it. However, this was done by sanding. Therefore the finish was also removed. Therefore the finish was also reapplied by said painters, subsequently dripping on the floor to stain the tile, being removed with one of my bathroom’s washcloths, or even being removed from the trim by my children’s hands and on one occasion, wiped on the walls (a color I did not plan for).

I lack the words to express my inner reaction to what happened next. When the painters were asked for their estimate to finish the job, they gave a figure that was three times more than what we eventually ended up paying. Outwardly, my eyebrows merely raised. I asked the landlord’s representative privately if it would jeopardize his relationship if I declined to let them disfigure the rest of the house for an exorbitant fee. (I was more tactful at that point.) He did not feel any obligation. I was relieved.

Thankfully, eMi had a painter that did a wonderful job on the rest. He even happened to be somewhat of a jack-of-all trades; Godfrey has been here every day this week fixing the weird things that we’ve needed (creating L-shaped shower rods, installing a plug on appliances that whoops! didn’t come with one, putting down some cement where all the cars were bottoming out on the driveway, or installing a circuit breaker because our clothes dryer blew out the power, etc.). Godfrey was discipled and trained by a missionary years ago.

And that’s probably our take-away from all this, even as we look for house help here (—another discipleship opportunity that’s been fun so far). So many of the Ugandans that we see succeeding professionally and spiritually are those who people have taken the time to invest in personally and develop intentionally, one by one. That may sound like some kind of God-complex, but in reality, it’s true for every one of us who have had the power to beat poverties in our own lives. It’s people coming alongside us, showing us Jesus. This week and its bizarre fiascoes and painting chaos have reminded me that what John will be doing in construction management, and even what I’ll get to do in my learning-and-teaching relationship with house help, is a really powerful thing. It’s not just because we found someone who knows how to get wall paint only on the wall and has proven trustworthy with our cash. It means that someone has been empowered to be the fullest version of God’s workmanship to do the good works He’s prepared in advance for him to do.

Guess you could say that’s a house of a different color.

Our house, Part I: A few photos

2012-02-18T10:54:00.001-08:00

There's more to show, but we wanted to give you a limited tour of our new digs.

Here's what greets you when you drive in our gate. The small building to the right is called the "boy's quarters"—as in, a place for house help to stay. (Or friends and family who come and visit missionaries in Uganda! Hint, Hint. Not that you'll be expected to clean or anything.) That's where we keep our washer and dryer. Can you hear the angels singing? I didn't think we'd have one of those. Apparently the landlord didn't either, because they blew out the power and we had to get a new circuit breaker.

You can see our garage on the left, which we open up for homeschooling. We had one wall painted in blackboard paint! I'm pretty excited about having a room just for school, which we didn't have before.

And yes, our house was supposed to be painted yellow. But you know, considering it was two shades of orange when we arrived, and one was really more of a peach, I am thankful for the orange. Especially since the dirt is orange. We're in the hottest time of the year here, i.e. the dustiest, with the coolness of the rainy season just around the corner. But the heat is dry, and even at 90°, it's only like May or late April in Arkansas.

The above is our back porch, which we adore. It's a peaceful place to eat, and the kids have a drag strip right down the middle of the yard. Our avocado tree is on the right here. Even now, the weather is beautiful for outdoor living, and we have bougainvillea, a couple of rosebushes, a mango tree, a papaya tree, and a pumpkin patch. I thought the avocado tree deserved its own photo, considering I was hoping to have one in heaven and am getting it way early.

Even though we live in the middle of the city, you can glimpse Lake Victoria, the third largest lake in the world, from over our back fence. We have a fishmonger, Moses, who brings a box of fresh-caught tilapia on the back of his motorcycle every Tuesday and filets it right at my gate. I really like the local produce here, too, and I think I've found a milk supplier.

This is our living/dining room as of this evening. (See J. there in the corner?) All of the furniture was made for us from local wood (this kind is called mugavu), and we just got the cushions back tonight. Can you see the little African drums on them? We asked for extra stuffing, because all the padded furniture here is kind of like sitting on a couple of pieces of plywood. Let's just say it's "very firm."
There's this lovely industrial, linoleum-type tile that covers my home that kind of makes it feel like a Wal-Mart. It's probably a good thing considering the red mud that's tracked down every hall. The floors have to be done every day. But we are looking for a rug because Dad and the boys miss wrestling.

Found this in the living room and it looked hungry. Guess we'll keep it.

We're thankful that our toilets are sitters and not squatters.That's probably all you care to know.

Here's our master bedroom; we love our new bed, and it was very affordable. As for the paint on the walls, we really like how the colors turned out, but the full story is a minor fiasco for another post.

Thanks for visiting. I'm sure we'll have a little more soon. Don't you want to come see the real thing?

The latest, 02.12.12

2012-02-12T11:45:00.000-08:00

Our furniture has finally arrived, soooo....first night in our own house! YAHOO! It's a mess, but it's our mess. eMi, namely Paula Sauder,has been amazing, carting us around town for all the things we've searched for to set up a home until we can find a vehicle. John's looking this week, so we'd be grateful for your prayers.

And another one bites the dust: Kid #3 with an ear infection from the colds we brought over from the States. That means out of eight kid ears, five are infected. Thankful for convenient relief over here.

This week, I have seen
1) a monkey in our driveway (as in, a big one)
2) a motorcycle with about twenty live chickens tied together
3) a fish as big as my daughter on a motorcycle.
This country fascinates me.

Ear infections, African style

2012-02-10T12:44:00.000-08:00

We now have two kids with double ear infections. But you know, one of the eMi moms has her own otoscope and knows how to diagnose them, so she just walked over here. Then I just hoofed it down to the pharmacy and asked for what I needed--Augmentin--and mixed my own suspension. Probably the easiest ear infections we've had yet. Thanking God for accessible medicine when everything else takes about three more steps than it does back in the States!

Full circle

2012-02-07T10:41:00.000-08:00

From the rising of the sun to its setting, the name of the LORD is to be praised! Psalm 113:3

This verse takes on new meaning as I sit here writing in the dark, and you're all over there eating your PB & J's or grilled cheese or something, maybe wishing you could sit down to enjoy them. I like that even when my sisters end up in their destinations around the world, God will be praised in Mae Sot, and then Kampala, and then Sheffield, and then Little Rock as the earth circles the sun each day. I think about that especially on Sundays, as the Church praises God in an endless stream. Pretty crazy when you think that the verse was written millenia before we knew the earth was round.

A door-opener

2012-02-07T10:24:00.000-08:00

I've been learning little bits of Luganda here and there (not that I know how to spell it):

"Oleotea!" (How are you?--the common greeting), followed by "Giendi!" (Fine!)

"Jieba-leko, Sebo!" (Well done, man!)

The great part about these little phrases is the great doors that open before my eyes. It's almost like watching these previously skeptical faces unfold like flowers. One of my favorite things about Uganda is the friendliness of people to just a little bit of interest shown in them. It's almost like a fun game to watch them transform.

Today when I took my first trip to the open-air market to get some fruits, veggies, and grains (so fun--and much less overwhelming than trying to decipher the grocery store later this afternoon), my Ugandan friend counseled, "Greet them in Luganda. You'll get a better price." And a better relationship! Sometimes people even start laughing out loud (in a good way). I'm hoping our househelp will teach my kids Luganda, and maybe we can even learn a phrase a week together. I'm thinking it can go a long way.

Recap: Week One

2012-02-07T10:09:00.000-08:00

We’ve been in Kampala for a week now, which is hard to believe. In some ways, we’re settling in nicely. In other ways, there are reminders everywhere of just how foreign we are—reinforcing over and over again that we are “looking for a homeland” (Hebrews 11) that isn’t anywhere on this planet. Today, I told my kids how excited I was after this week of crazy errands to be spending my first full day with them in a week, some of the most fantastic people in the world to me! And that’s when W. immediately piped up, “But what about your mom?” And that’s when I promptly turned into a little puddle on the floor.

At any rate, the high points:

· We’re not in our house yet, but we’re very comfortable with that. We’ve been staying at the director’s house (who’s in the Democratic Republic of the Congo) with his wife and boys who are our boys’ age.

· Their nanny/housekeeper has taken wonderful care of the kids while we’ve been gone, and the number of eMi kids in the vicinity in the same age has been fantastic. The kids are very happy thus far.

· The only exception last week—and it became a biggie—was our youngest. He’d arrived with a cold and felt very insecure, which mixed with a healthy dose of jet lag resulted in him waking as frequently as every twenty minutes at night. I think God was giving John and I an opportunity to accept whatever He’d give with open hands. The kids kind of started melting down around dinner time. These seven nights became a good exercise in joy—! We were exhausted, but the trips all over Kampala in the bizarre traffic was enough to keep us wide awake.

· J. is doing great now. We’ve had two nights of SLEEP with only about four wakes between the kids, and this has been amazing. Can I just give a woot-woot?

· We’re learning a ton about how to live here well, from dealing with potential scammers (starting when we walked out of the airport) to where to buy whatever, which is never all in the same place. A smattering of our other tidbits:

o There’s only one store that accepts returns.

o Thou shalt soak thy vegetables in powerful stuff before eating.

o Water out of the tap is not your friend.

o Dry your clothes in the dryer for ten minutes after they’re on the line to avoid mango fly burrowing into your skin. Drying them all the way is a lot of electricity, a pricey commodity.

o Expect the power to be out every other night and about once every three days. (I must confess that we miss the relief of a fan on powerless nights.)

· We just finished up purchasing our appliances today. Each one needs a voltage protector from the frequent surges. But contrary to what we thought would happen, we are now the proud owners of a microwave, washer, and dryer. This is a big source of thanks, and really helps simplify life here.

· I’m getting excited about our little place, especially because of the local touches that I was looking forward to: locally-made furniture, a bit irregularly shaped terra cotta ceramic dishes from the craft market, African baskets we plan to keep toys in, and even sheets from local fabrics are a possibility. Way cool.

All in all, the weight of this week reminded me of the lyrics of one of my favorite worship songs.

The sun comes up

It’s a new day dawning

It’s time to sing Your song again

Whatever may come and whatever lies before me

Let me be singing when the evening comes!

Bless the Lord, O my soul…

Faith calisthenics

2012-02-05T06:50:00.000-08:00

Wanted to share this blog post (which originally appeared on MomLife Today) on how God's been increasing our faith on this journey. Thanks to all of you who have been contacting us, commenting, and encouraging our family.

Gaba Road

2012-02-03T23:19:00.000-08:00

Allow me to introduce you to Gaba Road. It's also called Furniture Road here: Sections of Kampala are covered by the same types of dealers, like the industrial area. Gaba Road is lined with piles and piles of furniture, many of them clustered into the same type. It just sits out there on the dirt, and I've been told that it's fascinating to see these guys work when it starts raining, getting it all inside faster than you'd ever imagine.

Behind them sit shacks of cement or other materials with tin or plastic corrugated roofs. Women are doing their wash outside their homes, and children shout "Mzungu!" add the odd-colored foreigners. Chickens peck here and there. Men are using handsaws and nails on the furniture they're fashioning to add to the mind-boggling selection.

It smells like exhaust, sawdust, and the uneven, littered, red dirt that all of the furniture sits in. I had this vision of a dream being fulfilled--crazy, I know: I was there in this long, colorful skirt that the breeze occasionally blew around my sweaty legs standing there in the dirt in these industrial-strength sandals we were supposed to buy to endure Ugandan terrain. I had pictured that in college when I thought about how much I wanted to go to Africa. This was so fun!

We came yesterday afternoon to purchase our furniture. (Note to the mzungu: Wear sunscreen next time. Owie.) Because we're white, we are often initially charged double or triple--I told our driver that I have expensive skin!--but you're expected to haggle. They're almost disappointed if you don't. So one of our biggest godsends yesterday was Peter, our driver, whom we paid for the whole afternoon, and who saved us a whole lot more than we paid him.

Here's how it worked:

Mzungus John and Janel picked out some furniture they liked from the pieces they agreed they'd need.Sometimes they are invited inside to view more of the selections, which was a bit scary considering this involves a dark little cove inside one of the shacks with Africans of varying ages staring at you from where they lounge in the furniture and their children toddle around barefooted.
John and Janel talk with Peter about what they like and what they think is a fair price based on the price given. This takes about one minute.
Peter haggles with furniture dealer in Luganda, the area's tribal language. This takes about ten minutes, and like table tennis, the dialogue ping-pongs back and forth with dramatic flair. All parties usevery educational and amusing expressions and gestures that give mzungus an entertaining idea of what's going on. John and Janel learn about Ugandan body language.
All parties crack jokes with one another: "I can make you that for that price, but your children might fall through the chair." "This table seats twelve? How does that work? Do you stack the guests on top of each other?"
John and Janel occasionally ask in their best Ugandan accent for pieces that "have that finish, with that design, and that wood. Can you do that? How much? Can you have it by Wed-nes-day?"
Considerably lower price is agreed upon. Parties shake hands. John and Janel make everyone laugh with one of their three Luganda phrases: "Webale nyo, Cebo." Thanks, man!
John and Janel return with Peter, presumably next Wed-nes-day or Thuhs-day to confirm that the furniture is satisfactory--before a houseful made from exotic woods is delivered to our door! (HOORAY!) This is deeply satisfying to John and Janel, who up till now have had relatively unproductive days purchasing things that cost considerably more than expected.

Despite the sunburn that makes the Ugandans laugh and creates a great conversation starter, I had some exhausted satisfaction and a lot of hilarity that I think went both ways. I learned so much, particularly about money conversations that--instead of being offensive--are simply another social interaction for Africans. It was a good day.

We made it!

2012-02-02T21:30:00.000-08:00

It’s true. I’m writing from a pleasant, warm evening in Kampala, on an increasingly dear friend’s comfortable couch. (We are nine hours ahead of Central Standard Time during Daylight Savings; eight during the rest of the year.) It doesn’t feel like I’m living here yet. (Will that change when I’m writing from my own sofa?) I am peering through the haze of jet lag, and am also looking forward to sleep just because it seems the only appropriate solution to all the foreign that speaks and honks and jumbles around me, quite literally.

God’s fingerprints were all around our flight—perhaps most visibly in a) the man for whom I’d been praying for weeks, i.e. the airline attendant who checked us in, when he waived fees to the tune of $280 over the too-large “personal bags” we’d had to check. I was amazed and so thankful—especially when we found ourselves wondering how we’d have made it walking on with two more carry-ons; b) getting to walk/stumble/sob our way into a DFW security line with only a couple of other people in it; c) every single one of our 18 bags, six carry-ons, six wanna-be personal bags, two carseats~~, and a partridge in a pear tree~~ made it to Uganda. Thanks, those of you who prayed! The kids behaved very commendably on the flight, which was of course a tremendous relief. I didn’t entirely plan on my youngest getting airsick upon landing in London, nor did I anticipate just how little sleep we would all get. But it may have actually helped my kids’ jet lag anyway.

Today we recovered for most of the morning, and then shopped for appliances (we have to buy our own here) after walking through our house for the first time! eMi had even sent a team to clean it for us. It’s small but sufficient, old and quirky but highly functioning. Right now the outside is two shades of orange, which is, you know, sort of close to the yellow we thought it was going to be.To my delight, there’s a mango tree that may have some great days of climbing for my boys, a papaya tree, a pumpkin patch, and, drumroll please, an avocado tree loaded with fruit! We even had some for dinner that I picked up off the ground. The yard’s gonna have some great fun, there’s a perfect shady spot for schooling outside, and we hope to pick out the interior covers of paint tomorrow. I’d prayed for a yard, fruit trees with one to climb, and a great space for outdoor living—and if you can believe it, God granted all three. I am humbled.

So many emotions right now as we collide with the things we love, the things that will take some getting used to, and just a small handful we will never be used to. Right now, I am praying for sleep tonight. My youngest has a bad cold and a lot of insecurity, resulting in our fifth night of near-sleeplessness now mixed with cultural adjustments during the day…have mercy. Gratefully, we are surrounded by incredibly generous and gracious missionaries who laugh when our kids come close at their dinner table.

God is able--!

New Year, New Adventure--Same Ol' Me (and New Me)

2012-01-15T17:20:00.000-08:00

I reflected a lot on moving to Africa in this post. It originally posted a couple of days ago on MomLifeToday--so I wanted to make sure to share it with you.

Crazy is...

2012-01-11T12:15:00.000-08:00

This...made me laugh. Out loud. Let's just say that with less than three weeks before our family will be waking up in Africa, I resonate.

“I am on the board of a seminary where they have a psychiatric wing, and they wanted to send psychologists around the world to work with missionaries. They were coming in telling us how they were going to spend millions of dollars to bring mental health to all of our missionaries. And I couldn’t hold in; I said, ‘No! Don’t do it! We don’t need healthy missionaries. We need missionaries who are delusional, who are out of their minds, who are insane. There are two of them among ten million and they think they can change that whole city. You make them normal, healthy, sane and they’re going home to Kansas tomorrow.’” --Erwin McManus (swiped from my sister Kelli and her husband Stephen's blog)

A Small World After All

2011-11-03T21:46:00.000-07:00

It was, and is, one of those stories in which God's careful orchestration still causes me to shake my head and smile.

But it arrived in the form of two and a half days of travel. Five planned flights. Six actual flights. Two nights "sleeping" upright on a full plane. Unnumbered queues in five airports in five countries.

A delayed flight from Dulles Airport to Brussels had somehow resulted in the longest travel of John's and my lives as we limped from Little Rock, Arkansas to Entebbe, Uganda. (Neither easily located on a map by the average Joe, I'd wager.)

I call this one "bliss."

But God obviously has no wasted experiences in His economy. Bewildered and sleep-deprived with about eleven other travelers to Uganda, we traipsed around international airports. We slept in terminals. We swapped ideas to stretch our meal vouchers. And we mostly sat around and talked, sharing the stories that were carrying us to Africa. Some of us even herded Ugandan children like the one who fell asleep in my lap--to my utter delight.

Among a diplomat, a soldier, a Ugandan family, and a number of Christian aid workers, John and I met Lizzy and Cindy. They were heading to Uganda to meet who they hoped would be their future daughters in an orphanage for the first time. (How cool is that?!) Despite the hovering fatigue, it was beautiful to hear and see their anticipation to gather into their homes these beautiful girls they'd never met.

Lizzy, kid-magnet and adoptive mom-to-be

As we all prodded kids together in the Brussels and Frankfurt airports (which Lizzy and Cindy shouldered far more than I), took kids to run out their energy or use the bathroom, and laughed in exhaustion at our degree of jet lag or hygiene decline, I found comfort in watching God's plans unfold--despite whatever ours had been. I loved getting to know His Body as it was built up and sent out around the world. I loved contemplating whether I'd be holding a little brown baby of my own someday, or just how much I missed my little blonde and brunette ones.

The plot thickened when Cindy and Lizzy ended up staying at the same guest house in Kampala: "No way!" We complimented each other on how good we looked without airport grime after a good shower. Stopping at each other's rooms in the evenings or parting the jet lag fog at breakfast, we compared notes of what we'd experienced, and what baffled or fascinated us. John and I borrowed their computer for a couple of Skype attempts. He and I got the 411 on their first boda-boda (death-defying motorcycle taxi) experience.

Continuing in the uncanny, the four of us hung out at the airport awaiting our shared flights out of Kampala. Lizzy and I brushed our teeth together in the restroom and tried to swallow our anxiety as we waited (again) through security lines that threatened our boarding time. Back in the old U.S. of A., we swapped information as we concluded a life-changing and unplanned journey together.

...Or so we thought. I was delighted this past week to receive a Facebook message from Lizzy: She, Cindy, and their husbands are scheduled to depart for Kampala on January 27 to pick up their girls for good! And yes--that's three days before we'll get there. Lord willing, I can't wait to see these forever families together for the first time.

Just to say it clearly: God still amazes me.

Memos from a wreck

2011-10-29T19:27:00.000-07:00

I’d taken my mom out for her birthday: falafel and jasmine rice at this great new Mediterranean place with only a handful of tables. She had received a gift card for Barnes & Noble from a friend, and me being the bibliophile I am, I was more than happy to top off the night poking around the aisles. So we headed out, chatting and laughing. At a stoplight I glanced at the clock on the bank across the street, marveling at how fast time passed when we were together. When the light turned green, the minivan gathered its strength for the uphill left turn.

It’s then that I saw the headlights in my peripheral vision. I gasped. Braked. Then braced myself as a Corolla barreled into the front of our van. (Barreled it off, it turns out.) My head and shoulder hit the door. We spun about 90 degrees.

Mom and I sat there, stunned, assessing each other and ourselves—unhurt, except for what would be a goose egg tomorrow. Quizzed each other: I had the green, right? Yep. Still green. Did you see him? She wanted to know. Because I didn’t see him. Looked into the car that was now adjacent to us, where thankfully driver and passenger were conscious, certainly shaken.

In all the ensuing chaos of lights, paperwork, and metal, many little gifts from God began revealing themselves. They piled themselves around us in so many heaps: My mom and I stepping out of the van, virtually unscathed. A sober, insured, and humble driver who admitted fault, along with a witness who heard him. My four kids sleeping at home with a trustworthy babysitter. Fast, insightful emergency personnel. Responsive insurance companies. Kind, intuitive friends to pick us up since my husband and father were out of town together. Even free drinks at the nearby Starbucks when at last we walked in to use the bathroom, dazed and scattered.

But my greatest revelation didn’t show itself until the next morning on the phone with my very relieved grandma. I was attempting to explain the damage to our van—how it had shook and lurched when the tow truck separated the two vehicles so crunched together, our grill and fender now gone, wheels cocked sideways. (The speed limit on the cross road is 45.) I was telling my grandmother how I braked, and then…

I braked.

What if I hadn’t braked?

That smashed front end that groaned when it was separated would have been—my door.

I had not just walked away unhurt. I had walked away alive.

In a split second, God had possibly saved not only my health, but my life. Mine. God seemed to make it very generously, kindly clear that He still has plans for me here on terra firma. When I put down the phone, I went over and kissed my daughter’s head, suddenly hugely, somberly thankful to be making her oatmeal as she waited there in her pink flannel nightgown, wrapped up in her quilt.

In this whole journey to Africa, I have increasingly felt like a spectator, in a good way. God’s plans seem to whirl around me in gracious and powerful ways that open my eyes to how I am part of His plans, and not the other way around. It was a feeling of Psalm 91: “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty…under his wings you will find refuge.”

As I have watched God work powerfully around us—this little family way in over our heads, running like hamsters on a wheel trying to get ourselves out of the country—I have felt covered.

Side story: Retrieving some medicine from the pharmacy the other day, my kids were bouncing up and down like little pogo sticks. “We’re moving to Uganda!” one of them brightly announced to the pharmacist. She probably thought something like, What a nice story. Where did you hear about that place? Isn’t that in South America somewhere? So I offered a lopsided grin. “Actually, they’re telling the truth. We’re moving to Africa.” She looked at me, then glanced at the kids who were racing around me. Her eyebrows lifted.

“Are y’all nuts?”

Good grief. I didn’t even have all my kids with me.

The comforting theme of that story to me, which surfaces in little vignettes all over the place: Apart from God, yes, this is pretty close to bonkers. But with God, we are covered by Him. It’s as if our family keeps doing our little part, working and working away at all the strange and widely scattered details of immunizations and lists of items to bring and pricing garage sale items. Things are careening at breakneck speed and even crashing around us. But over all these things that are so far beyond what we’re capable of, my family hears, Just watch. I’ve got this one.

Be still.

And--we're on our way

2011-10-16T21:20:00.000-07:00

Arriving in Uganda last June

I'm guessing that most of you have gotten wind of our new direction. But just to get it all out there:

We're moving to Africa.

As in Kampala, Uganda. As in January. As in all six of us.

And baby, it is already one wild ride.

There are a thousand stories to tell you already about this crazy adventure God is writing--and a dream He's fulfilling. These stories find me swerving deeply into faith, and sometimes back into fear, too.

At the recommendation of a friend, I began a list last week of the definitive ways God's encouraged us and communicated so clearly to us, from our perspective, that this is where He's directing. There were already 25! Some of them are uncanny:

Finding eMi from a Google search, and upon clicking to contact for more information, it's an old family friend (close enough that my parents were his godparents).
The eMi World Staff Conference that hasn't happended in five years but was held in August in Colorado--so my kids got to meet all of their new missionary kid friends from Uganda right here in the States.
The woman who offered to pay for our plane tickets before we sent out our first letter.
This position with eMi that combines some vastly different areas of John's gifting into one occupation crafted for him--that fuels both of our passion for helping the oppressed.
John's recent connection with the deputy ambassador from Uganda regarding Peacemaking there.

Watching God work has been breathtaking. I keep verbalizing things like, "Seriously?!"

And still, I find myself mentally dashing back to Hebrews 11 as step after step closes doors and opens others toward January 30, 2012. With God's grace, I screw my courage to sticking places like this:

If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have had opportunity to return. But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared for them a city. (vv. 15-16)

Verses like these--and especially those that remind me of God's character--comfort me as we've said some quiet but significant goodbyes lately. Like to most of our stuff at a garage sale. Like hearing that my son's friend was crying about him leaving. Like my sister wondering again how she'll explain to my two-year-old niece that her cousins/best friends won't be coming around anymore. Or our closing chapter to another faith journey that was FamilyLife, one that was so far beyond what we could ever ask or imagine or think. We have been deeply blessed here. And we're not moving because we think we would be more blessed somewhere else, but because He's asking. So as I walked out of the building alone after a horde of friends prayed for us, the door thumped shut behind me on a place where I've felt respected and that my input and gifts were desired and used. As I think of that, each time I have to decide: Faith, or fear?

We have seen God blow our minds too many times to doubt this journey. He has been good, good, good even in times of great pain for us, and even now, the countless little (and big) generosities are humbling, even mind-boggling. They are, and He is, around every corner, encouraging us and calling us on. But would you pray that in every small moment, we would not just be pulled along, but be more than conquerors?

My other request is this. It is easy to feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of tasks, and simply the emotion of this road that is separating us from things and opportunities, but more importantly people, who are dear to us. I find myself crying at random times; praise songs take on these new shades of meaning; and circumstances often require I pray in lieu of freaking out. I'd ask you to pray for our strength, and that we'd know--and do--the good works God's prepared in advance for us.

The great thing about a time like this in which you're completely in over your head (!) is that success can only mean one thing: It wasn't you.

A sweet moment: Holding a (sleeping) fellow Ugandan traveler on our extended layover last June

“So—how was Uganda?!”

2011-07-03T12:46:00.001-07:00

I have been wondering how to best answer this question for so many of you. (Thank you, friends, for your prayers for us.) If a picture is worth a thousand words and I saw more than a thousand pictures in our week there in Africa, it will take more than one blog post to tell you. Especially if I want you to read it.

John and I traveled with Engineering Ministries International (eMi)—their East Africa branch, which serves eight countries in that area. We have a strong connection to their director, a family friend from my childhood. Essentially, they partner with Christian ministries in those countries to help design and construction-manage facilities for ministries like orphanages, churches, hospitals, schools for underprivileged kids, etc. using local workers. Simultaneously, they disciple and evangelize the local workforce on these projects…men who are doing all of the construction, from excavation to finish, by hand. You can check out eMi's website and/or this very moving video.

We were incredibly impressed with the organization's understanding and holistic, long-term view of how to truly help those in the vise-grip of poverty. EMI's views and methods were similar to a book, When Helping Hurts, that's been critical in forming John's passion for building up the powerless—though it also points out that we all have poverties of various forms. EMI is working hard to break cycles of poverty rather than perpetuate them. They're seeking to work themselves out of a job in developing these men as skilled workers (and husbands and fathers) who can build a strong, godly Africa—rather than make locals dependent upon mzungus (the Ugandan term that denotes a foreigner, usually a white person). This is a challenge, since Uganda's history as a British colony (ending in only 1962) seemed to communicate that white people were worthy of a higher degree of respect, and were a source of opportunity and wealth that could save them. We were definitely Caucasian head-turners in a crowd there.

Uganda is a place of such great contrasts to me. Its beauty is staggering: We stayed on the Nile for three nights in the most beautiful place I have ever been, topping even Switzerland in its ability to mesmerize me with its natural grandeur. We watched monkeys leaping from branch to branch, and oarsmen muscling their way against the current in dugout canoes. The colors alone dazzled this right-brained amateur of an artist/photographer. Even the birds were in jewel tones; the flowering trees were lush and full. Winston Churchill once called Uganda "The Pearl of Africa," and it's easy to see why. Plus, the Christians I met were undoubtedly kind, gracious, and hospitable.

But the poverty, too, was nearly seamless. Next to our retreat center on the Nile were thatched huts of children in torn clothes wandering among goats and chickens and pressing themselves against the wire fence to watch us. Once I was able to absorb the absolutely harrowing road traffic here, I noticed how many travelers on foot were without shoes —many with sizeable bundles on their heads. In fact, many construction workers were also barefoot, clad in flip-flops, or in ill-fitting shoes. You can see why tetanus is common, though a person who dies of lockjaw is still thought to be bewitched. For a country of 32 million, there are only 65,000 university spots. A majority of scholarships go to those from the president's region, leaving the eastern part of the country economically disadvantaged. Fifty percent of the population is below the age of 14; the life expectancy is 52. HIV/AIDS infects 6.5% of the population, which overall is considered "high risk" for infectious disease according to the CIA. (I can attest to this by having to "choose" with my doctor the most critical vaccines before my system would be overloaded, a problem we attempted to aid with an arsenal of prescription medications just in case.) For decades, world-renowned despots like Idi Amin (I understand he's the dictator portrayed in the movie The Last King of Scotland) took hundreds of thousands of lives; Amin even took all the money in the national bank. Joseph Kony, too, has made world headlines with his horrific, systematic brainwashing of children through forced brutality to their own families in order to create armies of violent child soldiers. Uganda's history is painful and at times crippling.

As I spoke to Richard, the foreman speaking in eMi's video above, I was captivated by a story from his childhood. He and his family had spent a night in the bush fleeing some tribal rivalries that had taken advantage of the overturn of power from one despot to another. One tribe was killing fathers in order to make their sons child soldiers. When he told me how old he was, I was surprised: Honestly, he looked older than his years. I mentioned, "You've seen a lot in your days, Richard."

He responded, "Most Ugandan men have."

I thought back to the photos of my sweet sons I'd just showed him from my camera. In grooming them into godly young men of courage who will lead their families, I am aware of how God wires boys to constantly seek out small competitions and battles that reinforce their ability to conquer and guide and protect. Maybe it's by determining the highest stairstep they can jump off without breaking their heads open, or maybe it's another battle between the Nerf sword and the Nerf battle axe. But these little feats gradually instill a sense of "I can." Yet Ugandan men, in this naïve, Caucasian American female's estimation, are constantly hearing, You can't. You can't provide for your family. You can't protect them. Richard explained to me—no, practically pleaded with me—that he thinks his country's greatest need are for its men to step up and lead their countries and their wives and their children, loving them well.

Poverty has, in my limited understanding from those who work in Uganda, left many of their people with a survivor's mentality—akin to an orphan's personality, especially since so many are in fact orphaned. Most are concerned with short-term problems of how to make it through the next day. They can lack some ability in long-term planning and foresight, whether that's with attention to quality on the job site or whether or not it would be most beneficial to steal a tool that might lose you your job but earn several days' wages if they sold the tool. As you might expect, poverty motivates many to manipulation and deceit, which are commonplace.

But I have a lot to learn from Ugandans. They tend to see wealth as something to be shared with a community. They place a high value on extended family. Their lack of convenience has brought them remarkable resourcefulness. Their pace of life is governed by their love for relationships. In short, they had—have—a lot to teach me about the image of God they reflect.

Not only that, but I find myself moved to the point of action. I fully trust that God is sovereign and good without me, so I need not be motivated by guilt or by fear for these beautiful people. Yet how can I go away from all that I've seen and do nothing? How should we then live? I found myself returning to that old analogy of the man walking along the beach strewn with starfish who would die unless they were thrown back into the ocean. He comes upon a boy who's picking them up and throwing them back in. The man says to the boy, "Why are you doing this? It doesn't matter; you can't save all of them!" And the boy answers as he pitches one into the surf, "It matters to that one." The question we must answer: Which are the "starfish", so to speak, that God's wanting us to throw back in?

X-Ray Questions

2011-04-17T18:46:00.000-07:00

Just when I think that I'm seeing less of some of the longtime idols in my heart...I realize that they've only evolved to a higher--or is that lower?--form of sorts: more crafty and cunning in their disguises. So I'm finding this list of "X-Ray Questions" from author David Powlison's book Seeing with New Eyes very helpful. Questions like these help keep my heart from sidestepping its deep-seated, twisted depravity to listen to the Holy Spirit instead. A sample:

1. What do you love? Hate?

2. What do you want, desire, crave, lust, and wish for?What desires do you serve and obey?

3. What do you seek, aim for, and pursue?

4. Where do you bank your hopes?

5. What do you fear? What do you not want? What do you tend to worry about?

What a list, huh?!

Mere mortals

2011-04-12T19:54:00.000-07:00

I was sitting at Arby's not too long ago and noticing all the kinds of different people one might see at an Arby's, munching on their Arby-Qs or curly fries or whatnot. That's when a quote came to mind, by God's grace:

You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations — these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit — immortal horrors or everlasting splendours. (C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory, 1949)

(...No, that whole quote was not on the tip of my tongue in an Arby's.) C.S. Lewis also has a marvelous image portrayed in The Great Divorce, of a woman in Heaven who is a truly great heavenly being; her presence can't be missed, and is beautiful to behold. From what I remember, she was a no-name on earth. But here, her being is unmistakable, because on earth, she loved well.

So as I looked around the Arby's, at the woman who took my change and other people who I might mentally dismiss--and admittedly, in my sin, readily shelve into categories based on looks or mental ability or even sinfulness (on my bad days, I'm sure I've landed on someone else's "sinful" shelf)--I might be encountering a heavenly celebrity. Amazing, isn't it?

Today I was reading a story with the kids. It was based on that classic metaphor of a caterpillar morphing, at long last, into a butterfly. And now, I have an image to attach to my meandering thoughts. What if some of the "caterpillars" we encounter in this world are just dormant heavenly butterflies, who will astound us with their true beauty when at last it's revealed? It's not unlike that Jack Black movie, Shallow Hal, when women appear outwardly as beautiful (...or as ugly) as they are inwardly. Wouldn't our world be a little easier if we could judge books by their covers? I wonder if mine would really look as good as I sometimesmake it out to be.

But alas...the Great Ruse of the Curse prevails: The price tags here will always be switched--the cheap things appear invaluable, and too often I find myself passing up the priceless.

Tonight, I'm sitting in Starbucks, looking around and wondering how God sees these people around me complete with their eternal destinies, sitting right here sipping their grande chais. These thoughts have already made me linger a little longer in conversation, or slip in an extra grin toward someone.

After all, who knows?

Quote: Spurgeon on pride

2011-03-13T19:54:00.000-07:00

This quote seems to startle me every time I read it...and show me that I still have a long way to go.

O believer, learn to reject pride, seeing that you have no ground for it. Whatever you are, you have nothing to make you proud. The more you have, the more you are in debt to God; and you should not be proud of that which renders you a debtor. Consider your origin; look back to what you were. Consider what you will have been but for divine grace. Look upon yourself as you are now. Doesn’t your conscience reproach you? Don’t your thousand wanderings stand before you, and tell you that you are unworthy to be called His son or daughter? And if He has made you anything, aren’t you taught thereby that it is grace which has made you to differ? Great believer, you would have been a great sinner if God had not made you to differ. O you who are valiant for truth, you would have been as valiant for error if grace had not laid hold upon you. Therefore, don’t be proud, though you have a large estate - a wide domain of grace, once you did not have a single thing to call your own except your sin and misery. Oh!
Strange infatuation that you, who have borrowed everything, should think of exalting yourself... (Charles Spurgeon)

If you're looking for a practical and truly wonderful message on this topic, check out this one by Francis Chan, which made it worth my youngest getting up at six one morning so I could listen to it...

Asking for directions

2011-03-06T19:22:00.001-08:00

The other day found me gritting my teeth in anxiety, hauling a minivan of four kids six and under—one carsick—over the hills of the backwoods of Bryant. When I'd left in a hurry to get my oldest (aka Mr. Carsick) to soccer practice on time, I'd taken a shortcut with what I thought were clear directions. Ah, but here I was, careening around potholed roads with nary a clue as to where I should go next.

My husband was out of town and not accessible on the ol' cell phone. So thinking quickly, I dialed my dad. He's one of those guys born with a map in his head: Strap a blindfold on, spin him around eighty times, and he can still point west. Not only that, but he's quick on the draw with his iphone GPS.

To my relief, he picked up immediately. As soon as I explained my dilemma/ignorance, he was on the computer, and seconds later, he was telling me what buildings I'd expect next and exactly where to turn. In his voice, I could hear his actual enthusiasm to help me. This was right up his alley. Within minutes—and finally on some straight roads—I was headed back toward the known world. The difference between the anxiety of being lost and late was replaced by the peace of a map and landmarks I could trust, not to mention the voice that had been giving me directions for life since before I could talk. He didn't let go of the phone until I was secure and doubtless of my destination. His voice sounded satisfied, happy to help.

Lately I've found myself continually seeking God for His direction on some big issues that are important to me. Sometimes the waiting and uncertainty morph into stealthy, gripping fear. But as I was reminded by my sweet Dad and a well-timed sermon, God's immediate and eager, not reticent, to offer me direction. I may not have the clarity of a cell phone in my ear, but I do have His Spirit. The question's not whether He'll be faithful to lead me into His will—what He wants!—but rather whether I'll allow myself to be filled with faith, patience, and joy as His perfect timing evolves:

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. (James 1:5-6)

He's my shepherd who guides me with rod and staff, who leads me in paths of righteousness for His own Name's sake—in a sense, the ultimate GPS. Bonus: Even I don't even have to worry about being late.

Holes in the holidays

2010-12-23T07:10:00.001-08:00

For the last three Christmases as we unpack ornaments to dangle them from our tree, the decorating has carried a ribbon of melancholy. So many of our decorations come from my mother-in-law, a year-long Christmas lover. Three years ago just before her favorite season, she passed away unexpectedly. Her memorial reception was actually decked out for Christmas in her honor. My husband, then 28, was deeply stricken. And my younger two children weren’t old enough to have any memories of her.

But by far, we’re not the only ones who feel holes that the wind blows through at Christmastime. I have at least three friends who will grapple with their first shared-custody Christmas this season, a heartbreaking reminder of the past year’s trauma and loss in their families. Another friend will endure only her second Christmas without her mom, a wound that still feels painfully fresh. And though it seems slight and small in comparison, I wince at yet another Christmas without one of my sisters who lives overseas, now coupled with another sister’s last Christmas before she heads to Thailand for two years. Despite the glimmer in my kids’ eyes; their storybooks with magical, picture-perfect tales of Christmas redemption; and a Christmas tree that nearly always makes my heart lift, reality tears at me.

Grief seems to swell at Christmas, when, more than any other time, hopes are high for above-average beauty, happiness, and perfection. But frankly, on this earth, my hopes will nearly always fall flat as an under baked soufflé. Not to be a pessimist, but after people brought sin to God’s flawless, “very good” magnificence in the Garden of Eden, we were each destined for lives full of gaping, searing holes. And even those of us who’ve found the ultimate Missing Piece—my overseas sister’s Hebraic tattoo probably says it best: we’re finally satisfied—we’re still in the land where vicious kings wipe out entire populations of baby boys; where people kill the Son of God in God’s Name as his mother looks on and a sword pierces her own soul, too.

We’ve still been created for another place. One Advent has been fully realized, and another still finds us “in lonely exile here until the Son of God appears.” Still waiting for Heaven.
As I sit and type, I’m praying for you moms who are nearly bent over inside with pain past, present, or future. I’m praying you’re swept up by the Prince of true Peace who’s even greater than your grief—and by his hope that lifts both your head and your heart.

May you be truly satisfied this Christmas.

The biblical view of things is resurrection—not a future that is just a
consolation for the life we never had but a restoration of the life you always
wanted. This means that every horrible thing that ever happened will not only be
undone and repaired but will in some way make the eventual glory and joy even
greater. (Tim Keller, The Reason for God)

A blogger's prayer

2010-10-27T06:21:00.001-07:00

This prayer was very moving to me as a blogger--and a great Kingdom perspective on why, and how, we blog. It was a great reminder to bring our writing back to Jesus and the Gospel whenever possible.

Single-issue voting?

2010-10-24T21:06:00.001-07:00

This week, my Revolutionary War-intrigued son was completing a place-value project for math that involved the number of American casualties incurred since our country's birth. At the risk of sounding callous, I'd actually assumed it would be more; as my husband roughly tallied the numbers we viewed, it was very roughly around one million lives lost in war from the Revolutionary War to the present. Considering our present-day-only population of around 307 million, this seemed like a precious and graciously limited price, though still tragic and horrific, to pay for the generous freedoms in which we bask. Proportionately, I assume that many countries have paid much more dearly. But my husband was amazed: For comparison, in the last thirty years, over 45 million babies have been lost to abortion. Forty-five million. If I'm right, that's about five times the city of New York.

This grieves me deeply. I was impacted recently by an intriguing interview between author Randy Alcorn and Mars Hill pastor Mark Driscoll, covering some interesting topics, including abortion. Alcorn pointed out Planned Parenthood's slogan: "Every child a wanted child." He wisely noted that he agrees with this premise, but (in my paraphrase) that Planned Parenthood's conclusion from this premise—taking the lives of the unwanted children—and ours as Christians, which involves changing our culture's value of children and life, among other things—are dramatically different.

He then pointed out something that I won't quickly forget. He noted that some Christians don't have a problem voting for pro-choice candidates because other issues are so important; and there are, indeed, a lot of crucial issues that should not be minimized. But, he asked, would you vote for any candidate who thought that it should be legal for parents to take the life of their three-year-old? Never. Any other issues would clearly be secondary. In this way, how we vote does reveal our true value of the unborn.

I firmly believe that God loves deeply the women who are faced with these agonizing, life-changing decisions and are often utterly alone. I have known and truly loved some of them, and my mom's gently counseled many of them. At a Teen MOPS group the other night, I was reminded of the great courage required of women who choose to keep their babies, and by those who choose to give them up for adoption. I believe God offers forgiveness to women who choose abortion, and I am convicted that as followers of Jesus, we need to be known far more by what we support: healthy, whole women who have options and support; children and families; life-uplifting morality; help and preservation.

But, particularly after watching that interview, I will be a single-issue voter. Because I believe that even those other key issues that are life-preserving--the environment, the poor, the war, the healthcare system, among many—are affected by a person's view of life and the goodness and sacredness of the One who gives it.

World Fest 2010: Don't miss!

2010-09-19T14:34:00.000-07:00

This Friday, September 24th, from 9-3 is World Fest at the Clinton Presidential Center and Park downtown. It's a student-focused cultural festival that seems to get bigger every year! Check out this link, particularly the FAQ's and the photo gallery to get a good feel for this FREE event.

Whine, whine, whine.

2010-09-10T09:42:00.001-07:00

It started last Monday, when we were headed on a nine-hour trip to the grandparents' in our slammin' minivan.

Problem: 16-month-old does not sleep in the car—at least without utter exhaustion—and is not entertained by DVD's.

Problem: We are in a wonderful stage of him testing his/our limits—if I'd really like to throw a fit for half an hour or longer, what will you do?

I am not particularly fond of the role of court jester, particularly in this situation, when few objects entertain him more than 30 seconds (there are a lot of 30-second intervals in nine hours), he's seated behind me, and he's pretty much just mad for nine hours.

One of my more well-hidden sins (yeah, I know, I think it's well-hidden…) is my ability to be a martyr. On the outside, I'm giving, but on the inside, I can be complaining or blaming. Basically, I choose in my heart to complain rather than truly give cheerfully and freely, wholeheartedly—pure-heartedly. Basically, I'm giving, but I'm not. And that's a problem. A sin problem. What I wanted to do in the van: COMPLAIN.

Yet God has been reminding me in less-than-subtle ways recently how He feels about complaining—you know, the whole "made the Israelites wander in the wilderness for 40 years" thing. Inward or outward complaining, I have come to regretfully realize, is the opposite of peace. Faith. Submission. Contentment. Joy.

So I asked my husband to hold me accountable not to complain the whole trip (sigh). But you know what? To my small-faithed amazement, God gave me what I needed. The kids and I all thanked God together as we pulled into Slice of Paradise, aka Grandma and Grandpa's.

Then I got to thinking: If godly men can seek to go a year with monogamous eyes, should I seek to go a year without complaining?

I think I need to go for it.

Trust me, God continues to give me plennnnty of test runs, opportunities to make a choice. Will I give in? (And what will I do when I inevitably mess up?)

And as someone recently pointed out me, early Christians went to their deaths in the Coliseum by singing. Paul and Silas, too, sang in prison—not our sanitized version, but the ancient-Roman, flogging, rat-infested, who-knows-when-you'll-be-released, there's-a-good-chance-you'll-die-a-painful, unjust-death prison. So practically, when I'm facing a disgusting or mundane or exasperating task, I've started to sing. I am intrigued: It has been nothing short of flabbergasting how it changes my mood and my focus.

So friends, keep me accountable: Here's to a year of joy.

Watch out, world.

2010-08-17T14:58:00.000-07:00

B.'s worksheet, on what he likes to do with his friend: "Chase girls."

I show my husband this, and he gives a fond, reminiscing laugh, telling my son: "You know you're good when you get *them* to chase you."

Working away (from God)

2010-08-11T21:17:00.001-07:00

I'm thinking it's time you know something I am really very bad at.

Resting.

Just sitting down, doing little but savoring something God created me to enjoy seems to necessitate a sturdy roll of duct tape (with a strip for my mouth—and one for my brain, if they make those). At first that could sound like I must be quite the woman of character—a hard worker; persevering; a servant. But my (occasionally irritated) family or close friends know better. The same God who created me to work and take care of my family also repeatedly associates Himself with rest, commands me to rest, made me to rest not only every seven days but one-third of every day. And I have a reputation for not listening.

While many of the reasons that I can't. Seem. To stop. Working are very good ones (waaaay more demands than I have resources, longing to serve God with every bit of the resources He's given, helping people, wanting to be the Proverbs 31 woman to my family, etc.), I also have some very bad ones.

Working late into the night, eating lunch standing up, etc. can feed my martyr complex: It's that strange sensation that if I'm uncomfortable or suffering to some degree, I am a better person. (This is quite wrong. I am working through Gary Thomas' Pure Pleasure right now, and believe me, I need that book. The subtitle: Why do Christians feel so bad about feeling good?)

Working to serve others can make me look good, or can put me in the "giver" position, rather than the humility of receiving (Martha and Peter are my biblical colaborers/co-OCDers in this). It feeds my insatiable pride, self-righteousness, and idol of others' respect.

Working
can attempt to replace my validation from God alone as I feel more important and worthy and in control. In that way, it subverts the power of the Gospel in my life—I depend on something else to save me, to make me "saveable" in His eyes other than Jesus' work. I try to bring something else to the table. Working can cement the idea that I am earning God's favor (wrong again; Christ's work gained my favor with God).

Working can replace my faith in God's ability to provide for me and give me time to accomplish what He's asked me to do—and nothing more, which really is that: when I'm doing "more" than He asked, it's stepping out of His will, doing less than His best for me. My labor can become an active worry (though in my mind, it's more of an active concern, or concerted effort), laboring and spinning rather than trusting, like the lilies, that God will supply my needs; after all, each day has enough trouble of its own. It can proceed from fear rather than faith.

Working can turn me into a profound "elder brother" like the one in the parable of the Prodigal Son, one lacking compassion, full of arrogance and contempt as I labor beneath a burden of my own making. If you have an inkling you could identify, by the way, the last message in this incredible series is a don't-miss message from Tim Keller.

Working can keep me from sitting at Jesus' feet, so to speak, taking the time to listen and enjoy God like Mary did. It can take the place of some truly great gifts and knowledge of God's goodness—the sheer joy of Him. I've missed moments of prayer, of laughing, of enjoying my kids that I will never redeem in this life. I've foregone opportunities for relationships and for adoring God rather than chafing under a burden I've created in His Name.

Now in my case, this may be a little bit of a "generational sin" too—my forbears have, in my very limited perspective, lashed their hands to the plow, so to speak. This is not an excuse; it is an explanation. But realizing this, will I choose courage and humility to break its bondage?

More to come on a more "solution-oriented" post as I think through this. I hope.

Meanwhile, please pass the duct tape. It's getting late.

Author's note: This post will also appear in a new blog for moms, Breathe.

Meals from books: Devouring a great story

2010-07-27T05:52:00.000-07:00

Last night we made pancakes fried in butter for dinner--totally unhealthy (well, the pancakes were whole wheat, I guess), but YUM and completely fun, because it was a meal out of a wonderfully illustrated children's book we'd just read, The Story of Little Babaji (and coincidentally, a book I loved as a child). This is a small tradition that my kids and I have started: occasionally making meals out of books we read.

I still remember making Stone Soup after reading the book in elementary school, and it's just a great way to engage kids in reading and create memories. A school teacher once told my mom that reading facilitates learning simply by helping kids understand their reality: when they see an object or a place, they think, oh, I've read about one of these! Cooking these recipes does this immediately: I just read about this, and now I'm experiencing it!

Most of these books didn't come with their own recipes, so just get creative and type in the recipe to a Google browser (hint: sometimes adding the word "best" before your search terms will have better chances of yielding a recipe your kids will eat).

If you need some suggestions to get you started:
The Story of Little Babaji (pancakes in melted butter)

Stone Soup (stew with a couple of rocks on the bottom)

Surprise Soup (vegetable soup with a pinch of sugar thrown in; you'll want to talk with your kids about whether or not a brother should say some of the things this older brother says to the younger one)

An Apple Pie for Dinner (uh, apple pie)

The Boxcar Children (recipes from The Boxcar Children Cookbook)

Little House on the Prairie (recipes from The Little House Cookbook)

Breakfast, reduced-sugar style

2010-07-21T21:59:00.001-07:00

My daughter was thrilled that we had snow cones for breakfast. Should I break the news that they're really called scones?!

In love: 2010

2010-07-15T14:25:00.000-07:00

Ten years of bliss. Man, is God good.

Exoneration

2010-07-06T19:15:00.000-07:00

My oldest: "But I didn't hit her on the head! I missed!"

Yeah, I'm sure it isn't sin if you have bad aim, buddy.

Kids Cook: Homemade Granola

2010-07-06T17:26:00.001-07:00

Until a friend suggested it to me, I didn't know how easy it would be to make our own granola, and the kids love it. Sometimes we mix in raisins or Craisins afterward, and it's great with milk or plain. Bet it would make a great trail mix, come to think of it.

This recipe is adapted slightly (for less sugar, less fat, and slightly less cost--we omit the coconut, too) from the classic cookbook More with Less, a Mennonite cookbook designed to help families eat healthier using less of the world's resources. That's when I got the idea to make my own Bisquick (though I use an even simpler recipe now, and substitute 1/2 whole wheat flour). Come to think of it, we're making our own taco seasoning, too. These have been easy ways to cut down on sodium and additives while slimming the ol' budget.

Simple Granola

2 c. whole wheat flour
6 c. rolled oats
1 c. coconut (I omit this)
1 c. wheat germ

Let the kids mix together (with appropriate construction site sound effects).

Combine separately:
3/4 c. oil (they suggest 1 c.)
3/4 c. water (they suggest 1/2 c.)
3/4 c. honey or corn syrup (they suggest 1 c.)
2 t. vanilla
2 t. salt (they suggest 1 T.)

Add liquid to dry ingredients and mix it up well. Spread on 2 cookie sheets and bake at 250 F for 1 hr., or until dry and golden. Store in sealed containers or a gallon ziploc. Makes about 8 cups.

And it was great in these homemade granola bars (see the notes on the side; we added chocolate chips...YUMMO).

"Of Grace and Grit"

2010-07-04T17:21:00.000-07:00

Had to share this moving piece from Betsy Childs of Ravi Zacharias ministries, published back in 2007--and still in my mind. --Janel

I started taking ballet lessons when I was four years old. I loved it. Not only did I get to wear a leotard, I got to dance around the room with a pastel-colored scarf. Then I turned five and moved up to the next class. In that class, they made us stretch. I hated it. My visions of being a ballerina did not include hard work and pain, so I quit.

I was reminded of my brief stint in the world of dance when I recently attended a performance of the Atlanta ballet. Watching the members of this professional dance company brought home to me just how wrong my childhood conception of ballet was. Those dancers had strong muscles, and although they made it look easy, it was clear that those leaps and turns were intensely athletic and were the result of years of hard work.

The thing that appealed to me about ballet was its gracefulness. I made the common mistake of believing that because gracefulness looks easy, that it is easy. In fact, it takes pain and perseverance to get to the point where exertion appears effortless.

I suspect that what is true of gracefulness may also be true of grace. Because we know that grace is free, we expect it to be easy. But "free" and "easy" are not synonyms. We do nothing to earn God's grace; grace, by definition, cannot be deserved. But that does not mean that the experience of grace is easy or without pain. The apostle Paul writes, "But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them-yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me" (1 Corinthians 15:10).

There is an important difference in the idea of working for grace (a contradiction in terms) and the working out of grace in our lives. As the grace of God worked in the life of Paul, it felt like very hard work to him. The hard work was not the grounds of the grace; it was the effect.

Have you ever met someone who was so mature in the faith that they made it look easy? Trusting God appears to be second nature to them, and their instinctual response to temptation is to walk the other way. I expect that if you were to question them, however, you would find that in the beginning it was not any easier for them than it would be for any one of us. Stretching muscles you aren't accustomed to using hurts.

If you have prayed for God's grace in your life, do not expect obedience to become effortless. That is not usually the way God answers this prayer. Rather, He provides the strength so that you can make the effort and bear up under the trials that sanctify us. James writes, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything" (James 1:2-4).

The testing of our faith is like the exercise of our muscles. Though it is painful, the end result is faith that is strong enough to persevere. The ballerina's graceful dance is the end result of grueling practices that the audience never sees. But she considers it worth it. May we likewise set our sights on the gracefulness that will be ours as God works his grace in us.

Long, slow lessons

2010-07-04T17:07:00.000-07:00

I was realizing the other night how different I am from the woman I was in high school, or college, or even the childless version of myself, or the kind of employee I was when I started working. It's strange--and comforting, though there are people to whom I wish I could say, "Look! I'm different now!" or even, "I'm sorry I hurt you."

From what I've experienced, some of God's greatest tools of change in my life have been suffering and waiting. But I'm now seeing that another powerful tool is long, slow obedience. Motherhood, for example, has been slowly changing my selfishness and impatience to perseverance and long-suffering. Ministry partner financial development brought courage from one of my biggest character deficits: fear of man. There are a lot of these tools that I'm now understanding, even in the midst of their pain and frustration.

It reminded me of an old story of a man who God asks to push a massive rock. The man pushes for hours, then days, then years...and to make a long story short, the rock doesn't move a millimeter. The man is anguished by his lack of progress, feeling foolish and angry. But then, God gestures to the man's new self in the mirror: After his daily labors, he is lean, muscular, perseverant, patient--strong. After all, the plan was less about the rock, and more about what God was doing in the man.

If you're in a long, slow obedience, may God lift your head today.

Faith for thought

2010-07-03T20:50:00.000-07:00

Only he who believes is obedient, and only he who is obedient believes. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Fast internet shopping

2010-07-03T20:37:00.000-07:00

I'm slowly becoming my family's assigned "internet go-fer"; I guess I find internet shopping fairly painless, and I love the satisfaction of a great deal. At the risk of patronizing those of you already net-savvy shoppers, I wanted to pass on one of the most efficient processes I've picked up on in hopes that it will help some of you save a little moola this summer!

1. On http://www.google.com/, enter the item you're looking for--for example, "wooden toy box". But to get more results, you don't just want wooden--you'd want "wood", too. To gather words with any ending, type "wood* toy box".

2. Up in the left-hand corner, select "shopping".

3. You'll see a lot of results for what you were looking for, along with their prices. On the right hand side's drop-down menu, organize the results by "Price: low to high". In some cases, this will bring up a lot of irrelevant results to your search, so you'll want to go back to sorting by "Relevance". But the former will put your search results immediately showing the lowest price. As a hint--once you know the manufacturer's name for the precise item you're searching for, you'll be able to search for that specifically ("Kidkraft Austin Toybox"), and sort them by price quickly without irrelevant results.

4. When you click on an individual result, if more than one store offers that item, often you can sort by Price + tax and shipping.

5. Google offers related search terms at the bottom of the page (when I looked up 12" bicycle, it suggested "12 inch bicycle" as well). Don't forget to search with synonyms of what you're looking for. In this example, you'd want to look for "wood* toy chest", too. If you're looking for "bike", do another search using "bicycle".

If this is hard to follow, please submit your questions in the comments section! And I'd love your tips for easily locating the best deals online.

Summer "bridge" activities for kids

2010-07-03T19:53:00.000-07:00

Wanted to pass on to you a few tips that other moms have been giving me on summer "bridge" activities that keep my kids' brains engaged! Hope it helps.

1. For the summer and the school year, I've found the reading lists in Sonlight's homeschooling curriculum to be great guidelines for books to check out from the library--usually with the help of interlibrary loan, which in our library system, is available online.

When possible, I get the books for reading to your children on audio books, and they'll start listening to them in the car (a captive audience) or when they're falling asleep...in theory...and I soon find them listening to them throughout the day, which they love to do while playing with building toys, like Legos.

2. I also get interlibrary loan ideas by looking in the kids' section at Barnes & Noble. I look for topics my oldest (our only independent reader right now) will love--the recent find was Hungry, Hungry Sharks. I also look for drawing books (great to increase small motor skills for boys' handwriting) and kids' cookbooks, to talk about math and science. A shout out to Barnes & Noble for their new educational toys section, which gives me all sorts of fun ideas for interactive learning. They have some cool at-home science kits, particularly.

3. As a loose schedule, in the morning--our best time for concentration--I have my son read out loud or independently for a certain number of pages or length of time. During the little kids' naptime, he draws a picture of something from the story and writes a summary sentence about what he's read. The idea is to verify comprehension, teach summarization skills, and work on basic grammar, spelling, and writing--in simple, relatively painless fashion.

Then he and his Pre-K little bro complete a few worksheets on their own. I like Hooked on Phonics' Super Workbooks, Brain Quest workbooks, FlashKids complete curriculum workbooks, and Get Ready for [grade level]! binder workbooks, because they're full color with interesting illustrations and not too many brain-numbing exercises per page.

We check out educational videos for use during naptime too: The Magic School Bus (great for science principles), Between the Lions, and Popular Mechanics for Kids are some of their favorites.

I've started to invest in about one new interesting educational computer game per semester/summer that fill up that hot, quiet afternoon. Scholastic's Math Missions is next on my list, but we've enjoyed Zoombinis' Logical Journey (there are other Zoombinis logic games that look great, and check out these Crazy Machines games), Reader Rabbit, and some of Scholastic's Clifford programs. My son is interested in the Typer Island Typing Instructor software I purchased and repeatedly comes back to it to try, but at this point, typing is still a little above his concentration levels! I also keep a "favorites" folder of educational websites.

We build storytimes into our day--each one picks a book for us all to read before naptime, and we've been reading Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle and a Bible story before bed.

4. Summer's a great time for impromptu field trips: zoo passes, museum trips on discount days, children's theater trips, and all of those things families normally don't have time for! (Budget-wise, we're sticking to the zoo pass this year...)

5. Swimming lessons have been a fun way to ramp up into a little more discipline of character: trying new things, learning to trust and persevere...all sorts of character lessons, while learning a new skill.

6. My Pre-K'ers are lovin' a new post-nap activity: Popcorn Preschool. We make popcorn and then practice basic counting and addition. I'll write a super-simple addition problem on a white board, then they count out the popcorn, add 'em up, and write the number on the white board. Usually we'll follow with some basic reading skills until they lose interest.

7. For Scripture memory, my kids adore a series of CD's that I actually enjoy playing in the back and the front of our rockin' minivan: Seeds Family Worship. Sample our favorite one here, which also comes with a free CD to share with a friend (since it's the Power of Encouragement). I shared ours with my sister, who's now gone out and bought the rest!

I love that they're straight from Scripture--and that I don't want to bang my head against the wall when their tunes get stuck in there. I love that it makes me meditate on the verses, that my kids sing them around the house and play their imaginary instruments when they listen (my middle son plays the tuba, which isn't really in the band), and that it prompts great discussion.

Your turn to pass on more ideas! What bridge activities keep your kids engaged?

More kid pics!

2010-04-10T09:26:00.001-07:00

A little soul food

2010-03-31T21:22:00.000-07:00

Only he who believes is obedient, and only he who is obedient believes. -Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Who's your mommy?

2010-03-29T14:06:00.001-07:00

In typical Southern fashion, we have been learning about "Yes, Sir" and "Yes, Ma'am." My daughter, at breakfast: “Mommy, is Daddy da ‘sir’, and you da man?”

Heaven is like...

2010-03-12T19:57:00.000-08:00

My little girl spent the night at Grandma's this week, which very well may be her favorite place in the entire world. She ate waffles for breakfast and got to watch Clifford and Curious George. Tonight, she asked, "Mom, can I wake up at Grandma's?"

A couple of friends of mine are struggling in battles with cancer. Heaven provides me such hope as my heart twists for their anguish and pain. I think about Heaven a lot anyway, and tonight I found myself comforted: Heaven has got to be a little like waking up in your favorite place in the whole world--with someone you love waiting to hug you, and your favorite breakfast sitting at your place at the table.

Better late than never: A unique Lenten fast

2010-03-12T19:26:00.000-08:00

A couple of people have recently reminded me that fasting for Lent isn't just about what you're giving up--it's fasting toward something; and in the broadest sense, it's fasting toward God. I've been intrigued by the concept of fasting lately--how it trims the fat from our souls, makes us hunger for God.

As a side note, someone else remarked that when we're struggling with specific sins, as we seek to move toward God in prayer and other disciplines--aside from just focusing on that sin--we experience more victory as we simply commune with Him. Great thought. It's got to be a little like the woman who touched Jesus' garment, or those who laid in Peter's shadow: Just being near God changes us.

All this to say, my sister sent me this link from the UK, and I found it to be a unique spin on a Lenten fast: restraining carbon emissions (scroll down for a Word or PDF document detailing each day's fast for the 40-day period). The Anglican bishop from this church remarks,

All of us need to think more deeply about the energy we use and the effects on other people. I commend the Diocese of Sheffield's Carbon Fast for Lent 2010 as a really helpful and imaginative way to focus on the effects of climate change on the world's poorest people.

In short, they're fasting toward awareness of our own actions on the poor--toward compassion, in my understanding. Seemed an interesting insight to God's heart, who links fasting to compassion and justice in Isaiah 58.

A spiritual mismatch in marriage

2010-03-08T14:15:00.000-08:00

I was amazed by what God taught me in a conversation with a friend. If you'd like, check out this article: A Spiritual Mismatch--and the God Who Sees.

Parenting and anger

2010-03-07T14:01:00.000-08:00

Anger is an issue I struggle with significantly as a mom. I read this quote on www.desiringgod.org, and I'm directing this one toward myself as a mother.

"...you overcome your own anger and replace it with tenderhearted joy. Joy that spills over onto your children. When the mouth of dad [or mom!] is angry, the tender emotions of a child are consumed."

The author cited Ephesians 4:31-5:2, and basically explained in this article that God went to great lengths and self-sacrifice to lay down His own anger--by sending Jesus. So I, too, should imitate God this way.

A great reminder to me...I'd appreciate your prayers in this!

Recent kid pics

2010-03-07T11:47:00.000-08:00

C. dressed up like Jeff Gordon. The "girl with brothers" thing runs deep. A lot of times she has a tutu on...with a plastic helmet and a sword.

He's an easy smiler!

Making medals for our Family Olympic Night!

Ten educational products worth your $$

2010-03-05T20:14:00.000-08:00

1. Cariboo. My kids love this game, and it's a good review of colors, shapes, counting, and letters--with beginning and advanced levels. I like the family time and teamwork. They also enjoy The Hungry Caterpillar Game, Chutes & Ladders, and Candy Land.

2. World Almanac for Kids Puzzler Decks. In age ranges from 3-13 on topics from Early Reading, math, U.S. history...these are made by one of the creators of Cariboo, and get my kids thinking.

3. Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons. At first glance, I didn't believe my friend when she said she'd used it to teach all four of her kids to read; it looked dry and hard-to-use--of which it is neither. When you complete the lessons, your child will purportedly read at a 2nd grade reading level. It's methodical, and it's great to spend time together with a plan already laid out. Check it out before you buy; it may not be for you, but it's worked for a lot of people, and has been around for nearly 25 years--still getting 4 1/2 stars on Amazon.

4. Math Gear Fast Facts. My son loves to practice his math facts with these, and it helps me change things up a little.

5. Pattern blocks. Great for creating patterns and designs on their own, or mimicking designs that are easily found on the internet.

6. Marbulous--and more. This is a classic but affordable marble-run set. Along with Legos, build/rebuild Caterpillar construction sets from Mega Bloks, the Matchbox Mega Rig Space Shuttle/Rover, and our wooden train set that's been added to over the years, I am amazed at the opportunities for learning basic physics and engineering, creativity, and strategy skills that toys like these provide. When my kids are bored, I've got nearly airtight chances that one of these will interest them, and I like that they use their reasoning skills, dexterity, ingenuity, and both brain hemispheres.

7. Reader Rabbit/Jumpstart software. Though I'm sure opinions vary on this, I like teaching my kids basic computer skills (moving a mouse, pressing a key) through controlled programs--and I love when something makes learning exciting for them, to the point that they initiate. We have Reader Rabbit in pretty much every applicable age and subject, and my younger kids rarely tire of watching the oldest play--so they're picking up a lot, too. Jumpstart even has basic Spanish, as well.

8. Base Ten set. If you're helping with math homework a lot or are just beginning to homeschool, this comes in handy--though it's an investment of at least $20. It's a very visual, hands-on method of teaching place value, addition, etc.

9. Melissa & Doug floor puzzles. We have a lot of these: The human body, a world map, a U.S. map, the solar system... Running from about $13, they're hands-on and fun to do together. I have a couple of avid puzzle kids, and we also like these continent puzzles.

10. Audio books. My kids turn these CD's on in their room all the time. Their favorites include The Boxcar Children series, Anne of Green Gables, and The Magic Treehouse (...well, the only one they've heard). I also have friends who love The Chronicles of Narnia and Adventures in Oddysey (technically an audio drama, but great for faith education). Older kids might enjoy The Indian in the Cupboard. I've noticed an improvement in my kids' vocabulary just from listening--even our two-year-old loves these!--and I think it improves their imagination, too (my oldest flips it on while he's playing with Legos). Hint: It's been a great way to settle everyone down at lights out.

Quote: Humility/teachability

2010-02-28T20:45:00.000-08:00

Learning is synonymous with being taught...I am ready to learn from any source, any person, at any time. -Mark Driscoll, Facebook feed via www.theresurgence.com

Great to meditate:

2010-02-28T20:43:00.000-08:00

The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love. Galatians 5:6

Super-easy peanut butter chocolate chip cookies!

2010-02-28T20:39:00.000-08:00

I made these with C. today, and we whipped them up in about five minutes. They're from Martha Stewart's Everyday Food--a recipe Emeril Lagasse makes with his son. YUMMO.

Note: If you do not want to eat cookies, do not make these.

Emeril's Peanut Butter-Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 c. creamy peanut butter
1/2 c. sugar
1/2 c. brown sugar
1/2 c. chocolate chips
1 egg, beaten
1 t. vanilla (that's right--no flour in these)

Mix it all together with a wooden spoon. Bake 'em at 350 for 10-12 minutes, until puffed and lightly golden.

Cute Valentine's Day projects for kids

2010-01-29T14:10:00.000-08:00

Martha Stewart has 26 V-Day ideas for kids!

Link: Protecting Your Child from a Sexual Predator

2010-01-29T08:00:00.000-08:00

Please pray for the effectiveness of this article--that God would use it to protect the Church from such harm and its consequences that impact generations. It's changed the way I parent!
Thank you.

Fun math: Balloons!

2010-01-29T07:56:00.000-08:00

Read this in my son's AWANA newsletter, and we tried it out this morning with leftover balloons from W.'s big fourth birthday (see photo of the cake out of the dump truck--that's crushed Oreos. YUM).

But I digress. The activity:

Blow up ten balloons, and on each, write a number from 1-10. Throw the balloons up in the air, and your child tries to catch two!

Level 1 difficulty: Identify the number.

Level 2: Add the two numbers.

Level 3: Identify the larger number, and subtract the smaller number.

This actually maintained attention spans considerably well!

Is it a midlife crisis if you're 29?

2010-01-22T22:13:00.000-08:00

I was Facebooking an old friend from college a couple of days ago. His life, as he described it, couldn't be better. He has three wonderful kids, a law firm in his hometown. I struggled for words to encapsulate the last seven years. What had I done since college?

What came to mind? The unexpected.

I hadn't expected to be working with the same organization as my parents, raising financial support for our current ministry jobs like they do. I certainly didn't anticipate having four kids this close together, or the realities of being a stay-at-home mom for the most part. I definitely did not anticipate the minivan. There are times when I look at my daily tasks and marvel at the fact that I have a college degree.

I thought back to college: I imagined that by this point, I'd be saving the world in some wonderful-sounding way or another. Personally, I have a passion for the forgotten and the poor, and I thought I'd use some of my cross-cultural experiences. So I basically pictured myself far from this continent helping refugees or something.

Now, as my husband and I approach 30, I realize that as we choose certain paths, we are not choosing others. Windows that were once wide open are now not-so-wide. Did I compromise? Sell out? Maybe you're wondering, like me, How did I get here? Or maybe the question deep inside of that: Is my life special? Am I just another run-of-the-mill mom?

Please don't get me wrong. I don't regret my children or my marriage. And God has provided opportunities to serve Him in my part-time job that are amazingly tailored to the skills and gifts He's given me. But if good is the enemy of the best, which is this?

I still think it's a good question to ask at any point in life, if not simply to realign myself with what God wants. But I had to go back and look at how God brought me here. Yes, I could have signed on with a missionary organization after college, for instance, and gone off into the sticks in Africa. But my husband wasn't gifted or passionate in areas of overseas ministry—and quite frankly, I don't know how much of my desire to minister overseas was actually my own naive ideal that makes some occupations seem more sacrificing or more beautiful in God's sight (or at least other Christians').

As my husband and I walked down each path ... that led to the next path ... that led to the next, we asked God for wisdom. And as I was reminded this week in James,

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (1:5-8, emphasis mine)

And I have to remind myself that even in the times where I haven't asked for wisdom Proverbs 19:21 says, "Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." I have a hunch that for now, God has me right where He wants me. And He will look at my life to see if I've been faithful to what He's asked me to do—not at whether or not it was spectacular (or holy-sounding).

Guess my life since college has only been unexpected for one of us.

What to do with all that grapefruit

2010-01-19T06:14:00.000-08:00

My kids even like this recipe for Broiled Grapefruit Crisp (I eat it for breakfast; trust me, they weren't interested before!), and it takes less than five minutes to put together.

Measurement games

2010-01-19T05:41:00.000-08:00

Right now we're learning about some different forms of measurement and estimation--estimating and measuring towers the oldest has made, different body parts etc. Made a great discovery of www.education.com, which is filled with activities and worksheets (today we're making their Olympic torch).

Here's one measurement game and an estimation game of theirs that I liked; it's also got some great Valentine's Day ideas!

Books: A beginning list for character development

2010-01-16T19:55:00.000-08:00

“You guys do leave some books for the other kids at the library, right?” my mom asked once as I hefted our book bag over my shoulder.

We do a whole lotta reading at my house—partially because I’m a big reader, and because I love the ease of having quality time with my kids when we’re reading. I love the discussion and education opportunities. And there are some lessons that just stick better with a good story—in fact, that’s mostly how Jesus taught.

So I started thinking about some books that were our favorites that also impart some great character qualities. Maybe these will be good fillers for your bag! I'm sure I'll be adding to this, if you feel like checking back--and I'd love your contributions!

Boxes for Katje, by Candace Fleming
Those Shoes, by Maribeth Boelts
Aesop’s Fables
The Giving Tree, by Shel Silverstein
Finding Joy, by Marion Coste
My ABC Bible Verses: Hiding God's Word in Little Hearts, by Susan Hunt
The Orange Shoes, by Trinka Hakes Noble
Say Something! by Peggy Moss and Lea Lyon
Smoky Night, by Eve Bunting
Ruthie and the (Not So Teeny-Tiny) Lie, by Laura Rankin
You Are Special, by Max Lucado
The Great Stone Face, by Nathaniel Hawthorne (older elementary children)
An Apple Pie for Dinner, by Susan VanHecke and Carol Baicker-McKee

For older kids:
The Book of Virtues and The Moral Compass, by William Bennett (a great anthology of character-laden stories and poetry)
Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry, by Mildred D. Taylor
Good Night, Mr. Tom, by Michelle Magorian
The Chronicles of Narnia, by C.S. Lewis
The Count of Monte Cristo, by Alexander Dumas (it’s a lot different than the movie!)

As a side note, for bedtime Bible stories, we’ve enjoyed
The Beginner’s Bible for Toddlers (ages 18 months-3 years for our kids)
The Beginner’s Bible (2 1/2 -6 years)
The Children’s Everyday Bible (5-8 [?] years)

Can you help me add to my list?!

Science starters

2010-01-16T19:48:00.000-08:00

I created a box for my kids: Let's Find Out Science! Inside, I've got slips of paper on cardstock with crazy kid science questions so that we can go look them up together. I've determined that a lot of a kid's success in education depends on knowing where to find answers!

I print most "school" documents in the Print Clearly font so that my son regularly sees how to make letters.

letsfindoutsciencequestions1 -

DIY Tangrams

2010-01-16T19:39:00.000-08:00

Tangrams are a great way to build a kid's spatial skills. Found out I can make my own!

Try printing this out on heavy cardstock, then cutting on the red lines (if you don't want the black lines on there, cut on the red lines, then use them as a pattern on a new sheet of cardstock).

tangramtemplate -

Click here for some images your child can attempt to replicate!

Poop (reader discretion advised)

2010-01-16T19:26:00.000-08:00

Tonight John found major poop in the toilet (ew, and on the seat) in the downstairs bathroom.

John: [Child's name], did you poop in here today?!
Child: No, tomorrow. I pooped in there tomorrow.
John: Do you mean yesterday? (laughing)
Janel (laughing): Or is that future poop?

Love Jesus through Haiti

2010-01-13T20:32:00.000-08:00

You've likely heard of the 7.0 earthquake that rocked one of the world's poorest nations yesterday. This link was posted by a friend.

Picture-word Journal

2010-01-03T15:12:00.000-08:00

Went into a Lakeshore Learning Store in Houston, where I drooled all over their educational stuff. But since I'm on a limited budget, John and I noodled on some of the ways we could do the ideas ourselves. I'll try to post them so that no one else out there has to recreate the wheel!

Their explanation of their Picture-Word Journal: "Our journal lets kids create their own picture-word dictionaries! It has lots of room for writing and illustrating words".

I'm making one for our firstborn so that when he finds new vocabulary or spelling words, he gets the dexterity practice of drawing while writing the word down, and also creates ownership of the word.

Feel free to use this one if you'd like. You can download this font, Print Clearly, if you'd like to use it in your own picture-word journal. Basically, just print two of these for each letter of the alphabet; we store them in a three-ring binder, and he writes down unfamiliar words as he reads. (As a side note, I want to honor entrepeneurship, but have to be somewhat resourceful since I can't buy everything I lay eyes on!)

picturewordjournal -

Happy Thanksgiving!

2009-11-26T20:11:00.001-08:00

God, my shepherd! I don't need a thing...True to Your Word, You let me catch my breath and send me in the right direction...You serve me a six-course dinner...You revive my drooping head; my cup brims with blessing. Your beauty and love chase after me every day of my life. I'm back home in the house of God for the rest of my life. --From Psalm 23, The Message

Responding to World Religions

2009-11-16T11:11:00.000-08:00

As you encounter other world religions, I thought that this site might offer you some specific, well-articulated responses from a Christian vantage point.

The insights into Islam were helpful to me!

http://www.lightshinesindarkness.com

Quote (that I stole from Ross and Taya)

2009-11-13T09:37:00.001-08:00

“Earth's crammed with heaven, and every common bush afire with God; But only he who sees, takes off his shoes...” -Elizabeth Barrett Browning

A few gift ideas for the one who has everything

2009-11-12T12:23:00.000-08:00

1) Purchase a few great-smelling potted herbs (rosemary and basil are a great start!), and replant them in a basket for an instant herb garden. Cover the soil with some craft moss for extra polish.
2) Send them a fresh evergreen wreath for the season (I like jillstwigwreaths.com).
3) Consider a personalized embosser for readers who loan out their books, or people who make their own stationery--just press it into a plain piece of paper or envelope. A personalized stamp is good for the cook who loves to give out her recipes. Expressionery.com often has 40% discounts.
4) Give a free date night or free babysitting. (Give ME housecleaning! Ha, ha!) Or as my mom did, give a puzzle, a Starbucks coupon, and a coupon for free babysitting--a date in a box!
5) Give a memory and an experience: Invite them out to a nice dinner you'll pay for, or for kids, give them a season pass to the zoo, tickets to a play, train tickets...the sky is the limit!
6) Give a coupon book. Since I'm bad at asking for things I need, my husband gave me coupon vouchers for a run to Starbucks, a girls' night out, a massage--all with an expiration date so I was motivated to use them!
7) Give to someone else. Worldvision.com has a catalog to give everything from a goat to fresh drinking water to job education for women, and you can give the gifts on behalf of someone else!
8) For the person overseas, send them an herb garden in an envelope--packets of seeds tied with a ribbon.
9) Give for a year--in a magazine subscription (Real Simple, Martha Stewart Living, Fine Cooking, Fine Homebuilding--it can be quite personalized!).
10) Give handiwork. Calligraphy, collages of your kids, great framed photographs of family members, lavender bath salts (kosher salt + lavender oil in an old Bell jar), homemade greeting cards...
11) Give a CD of songs that celebrates your relationship. (Pay for the songs.)
12) Give a kit to do something: a home spa kit; natural cleansers (I've done one post on these) in a caddy with microfiber cloths, etc.; a kit of things, with tickets, to enjoy stuff in their area (peanuts for a baseball game with a hat, etc.); a gardening starter kit; soda, microwave popcorn, and a DVD for a movie night; a mixing bowl, spoon, some spices, and a couple of favorite recipes; a pedicure kit.

DIY Baby Food 101

2009-11-09T07:13:00.000-08:00

This is for all you new moms out there. I'm not a nurse or dietician, so feel free to prove me horribly wrong. :)

It's a ton cheaper to make your own, so hopefully this can help make it doable for you.

A few general principles (if you already know this stuff, I’m totally not trying to be condescending!):
· Baby food is basically a soft fruit or veggie, or a cooked hard one, pureed with a little water in a blender or food processor (a few are soft enough, like bananas, to just mash up in a food chopper).
· Don’t cook if you don’t need to; that takes away nutrients. Save the water you cook it in to add to the blender, to keep some of the vitamins.
· Don’t feel like you need to add salt or butter (and definitely not honey, since they can’t have that till 1). Just like for toddlers, you’re training them how to eat for life, and they’re not used to having the taste of that stuff anyway, so they don’t really need it. But I don’t think it’s horrible for them if you just use the leftover veggies from your own dinner.
· To preserve it, just pour the blender contents into ice cube trays, then save the frozen cubes in labeled Ziplocs. Three cubes are thawed in about 45 seconds in my microwave; our six-month-old has two to three cubes per meal right now.
· If it’s a thinner consistency when you pull it out of the fridge or thaw it, just add a little cereal.
· Rice cereal makes it go further (i.e. makes it cheaper), is more filling, and adds some vitamins. Soon, graduate to whole grains so that he starts to like the taste of whole grain stuff (much healthier).
· You can eventually combine a few together, like bananas and strawberries or pears, or the mixed frozen veggies. But at first you want to serve them something solo for a day or so to isolate any allergies he might have.
· For ideas, look at the baby food aisle in the store (they have ingredients on the back if the name of the food isn’t clear about what’s in it).
· You can eventually try some more exotic stuff: mangoes, avocadoes, etc. A little more expensive, but if teaching your little guy/lady variety is important to you, it may be worth the extra cost.
· I tend to think that frozen vegetables are less processed, less salt, and generally healthier. But our pediatrician advised that we could use canned fruit as long as it was preserved in juice, not syrup.
· Around eight months you can add meat to the blend (I just used what we had for dinner if it wasn’t to seasoned or spicy! I want them to be able to transition to table food without too much trouble), but if you’re feeling more cautious, you can always cook a chicken breast and throw it in there. Spaghetti works fine too.

Bon appetit!

Educational ideas!

2009-11-03T20:00:00.000-08:00

I have only tried about half of these (many of these we're not ready for yet!), but some of them were too good not to pass on to someone!

1) Take a vinyl shower curtain and draw a big calculator on it. Let the kids jump around on it to practice their math facts. We may try this out with sidewalk chalk on our porch before I invest in the $5 curtain...

2) Check out this idea. Thought it looked really cool as a fun project to make; a geodesic dome out of rolled newspapers (no, I do not know what geodesic means. Maybe I should ask my kindergartener). http://familyfun.go.com/crafts/geodesic-dome-785150/There’s a video on it, too, at http://familyfun.go.com/.

3) A guessing game: Hold a handful of change behind your back and reveal both the number of coins and the total sum: “I’ve got six coins that equal $.54.”

4) Let them “order” an food from a restaurant’s menu (find them online) with a fictional amount of money. Or take it a step further, with philanthropy: Look at World Vision or Heifer’s online giving catalogs, give them an amount of money to spend, and see how different groups of kids would choose to designate their money to give away! Could be some of their first introductions to kids who are poorer than themselves, the idea of giving charitably, and the idea that if we give to certain projects, those projects keep giving—like a cow to a family who has to give its calf to another needy family.

5) Halloween candy science: soak various candies In water and heat them to see how they’re affected by moisture and temperature: http://www.candyexperiments.com/. Can also make bar graphs and use other methods to record observations.

6) Try http://www.funbrain.com/ and http://www.mathplayground.com/ for some math and language games.

7) Have you ever heard of the game Equate? http://www.amazon.com/Equate-The-Equation-Thinking-Game/dp/B00004U1RA It's an equation-building game that's a lot like Scrabble for numbers. Looks cool.

8) Roll dice, and have the kids get coins equivalent to what they’ve rolled (Put 4 quarters, 3 dimes, 2 nickels, and five pennies per person in the middle). As players amass money, they must trade in smaller coins for bigger ones. Race to $1. Once they get good, add a rule that says players lose a nickel for a missed trading-up opportunity. We play a simpler version: get the coins equivalent to what you've rolled; keep score by writing on your "writing to 100" placemat. Builds skills in counting money, adding numbers on dice, adding two-column numbers, and writing numbers.

9) Have them pick a place in your state or the U.S. they want to go, and research a) what roads to take to get there, b) things to do when they get there, c) a place to stop and see along the way, etc.

10) Label the bottoms of plastic Easter eggs with the parts of speech, then label the tops with words that apply. (It's harder than it looks to think of words that aren't both nouns and verbs!) Student matches the bottoms with the correct tops.

11) Label popsicle sticks with the names of a geometric shape: 4 sticks in one color that say "square", 3 in another color that say "triangle", etc.; work up to dodecagon! Have them make the correct shape. For preliterate kids, just put dots on the end (three popsicle sticks with purple dots on both ends, for example, could be put together to make a triangle).

12) We like to practice math facts with the addition version of this: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=math+gear+fast+facts. I actually alternate between these and Brain Quest questions, and my son can build up to certain rewards.

13) I have him go "shopping" by labeling your pantry goods with "prices". We work on counting money and addition. Not there yet with subtraction!

14) Here's a couple that posted on MomBlog.

I actually found most of these in Family Fun magazines someone gave me; $10 for a year’s subscription. I think I might end up subscribing just for the educational ideas!

Family Pics

2009-10-29T13:25:00.000-07:00

Family pictures (after which I took these) were actually fun last night! I know it had something to do with Guitar Hero and cupcake decorating afterward... Guitar Hero confirmed my sneaking suspicion that, at my core, that I'm not really that cool. I am okay with that. I think.

bride-to-be

My sister Jenn's mother-in-law, from England

groom-to-be

Yes, I see this face frequently.

After a delay: new pics!

2009-10-15T19:42:00.001-07:00

Classic dress-up picture!

The oldest was learning to count money this week, so I put pricetags on our pantry stuff and they went "shopping."

Baden's first picture of me.

Loves to spray anything. To death. A couple of days ago I wondered if he drew all over the wall, the door, and the washer and dryer with pencil so that I'd make him wash it all off.

Great reminder for me

2009-10-11T20:25:00.000-07:00

"A change in behavior that does not stem from a change in heart is not commendable; it is condemnable. Is it not the hypocrisy that Jesus condemned in the Pharisees?...Yet this is what we often do in childrearing. We demand changed behavior and never address the heart that drives the behavior." (Tedd Tripp, Shepherding a Child's Heart, 1995).

What moms can give

2009-10-08T09:17:00.001-07:00

I have occasionally been troubled by Jesus' words about the "widow's mite". Here's the story, so you know what I'm talking about:

Jesus looked up and saw the rich putting their gifts into the offering box, and he saw a poor widow put in two small copper coins. And he said, "Truly, I tell you, this poor widow has put in more than all of them. For they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on." (Luke 21:1-4)

Now, those of you who know me also likely know I am notoriously penny-pinching to the point of being ridiculous, and much of it is driven by my theology: I don't think that being wasteful is wise or loving. I think that dollars are important because they're used for kingdom stuff (by the way, I think that includes things like feeding my kids!). And I also believe that wealth can be as toxic as it can be good.

So God's been working on me these last few years on simply being GENEROUS. Being filled with faith, that is, rather than fear and selfishness or even my own occasionally idolatrous competitions with myself about money I'm saving--idolatrous, that is, in that money can become more important to me than loving people well--getting them good gifts, for example, or not using (gulp) expired food, or spending time looking for a deal that I could be spending on something more eternal.

Mind you, I am still a frugality nut. But God continues to teach me that this need to conserve runs deeply in my personality, and though it is good, can be a serious weakness. The Word talks about what sacrificial giving looks like pretty extensively. And God's teaching me that not only with my money, but also with my time, my energy, and other resources He gives--very richly, I might add--I can still sow generously.

But I digress! The other night, I was pooped beyond pooped. But my husband had been struggling with something, and when I saw him, I knew what would be emotionally and physically healing for him: A massage, however amateurish mine might be. Grant it, I tend to overextend myself. But in this moment, I believe the Holy Spirit brought the story of the widow's mite to mind, which I'd been reading to my kids the night before in a bedtime story. The message I got: I can give my mite, too.

When I am completely, utterly out of resources as a mom...which is a lot...God, I believe, sees the mites that I give. And in that, I can love Him lavishly. I can love other people lavishly.

P.S. I was right about the massage.

Will saves the day

2009-09-15T21:06:00.000-07:00

I came up into the kitchen tonight and everything smelled like Shout. Will had been sitting on the washer in the laundry room watching his brother race on the Cars website. When I came in, Will had the spray bottle in hand; everything in the pantry was drenched with stain remover. “It was on fire!!” he explains. Ah. Imaginary fire. Good thing we had the Shout handy.

Don't you mean "AWANA"?

2009-09-10T08:21:00.000-07:00

Mommy: Will, are you excited for AWANA tonight?!

Will: YAAAAAY! I love Iguana!

My little stairsteps

2009-09-04T07:46:00.001-07:00

Educational websites

2009-08-24T07:15:00.001-07:00

In celebration of the new school year, thought I'd share some of our favorites! Baden loves anything on the computer (I think we've bought Reader Rabbit in every version), so we've found a lot of good stuff.

http://www.nationalgeographickids.com/
The animal videos, maps, and facts are great. Note: Some of the videos mention a species evolving--a good conversation starter for us.

http://www.betweenthelions.com/
Great for early reading skills and other reasoning skills.

http://www.caillou.com/
Not as specifically educational, but has some great outlets for creativity (make your own house, choosing your style, windows, furniture, etc.) and problem-solving.

http://www.filefolderheaven.com/
www.filefolderfun.com
I Google "free file folder games" frequently and now have a host of great file folder games Baden loves. The printing and cutting out can be laborious, but is really rewarding.

http://www.eduplace.com/kids/mw/
Houghton Mifflin's math games that are an extension of their curriculum.

www.bbc.com/science
We like the organs game, the space jigsaw puzzle, and some others.

http://www.starfall.com/
Wonderful for a whole spectrum of reading skills, an online calendar time, and other games.

http://teacher.scholastic.com/activities/clf/index.htm
Organized by subject, this wheel has games for everything from Spanish to science.

http://www.sesamestreet.org/
So many fun games for toddlers thru kindergarten, teaching health skills, singing songs, reading skills, sorting, you name it.

www.nickjr.com/playtime
Preschoolers love it: Learning with Dora, Diego, and other characters they see, well, everywhere.

www.wordworld.com
Based off the brilliant PBS show, this has some innovative early reading activities.

I'm sure I'll be adding more soon, so check back when my memory (or my Google toolbar) is fully functioning.

Pics from the boys' trip to Houston

2009-08-24T07:00:00.000-07:00

It's an annual trip now--to Grandma and Grandpa's in Houston! This year Will got to come with Baden and Dad. These are the grandparents' faves. More to come!

The Breakthrough

2009-08-24T06:59:00.000-07:00

This morning, Baden asked, "Can we do some school before Robyn picks me up for Comm. Central [his one-day-a-week co-op that he loves]?"! Yes, Baden! Yes, we can!

He likes it! YAY!

First day of school!

2009-08-03T08:25:00.000-07:00

John took Baden to Comm. Central today, a classical education co-op. He’ll go all day Monday and I’ll teach him the rest of the week (our Plan B after not selling the house…but trusting it’s God’s plan A). We’ve been busy over here trying to make it even more fun than public school. So here’s a pic of him, his dad, and his NASA backpack!

I couldn't have said it better myself

2009-07-27T07:33:00.000-07:00

"Raising a 2 year old is like running a blender with the lid off." --Seinfeld

I forget

2009-07-26T20:32:00.000-07:00

As I was reminded this week in church, I forget to pray and to advocate the unborn. Who knows what our world would be like 30 million lives later: Would we have a cure for cancer, or aids? Strategies for world hunger...or national healthcare?

Thought this short clip was worth watching from John Piper.

The latest installment...

2009-07-26T16:56:00.001-07:00

Great Piper article: Birth control

2009-07-23T13:37:00.000-07:00

Thought some of you would find this interesting! I thought it was pretty well stated.

More pics!

2009-07-22T08:14:00.001-07:00

Washing the dishes that were thrown into the hamper and covered with clothes that were the victim of potty training.

Jack's introduction to hazing.

Our handsome little man!

This is classic. I'm dragging this out at rehearsal dinners.

A recent surge of girlness! It's great!

Well, not ALL girlness.

Mastering the art of the fake smile.

Thankfully!: Emma update

2009-07-14T10:27:00.000-07:00

From my mom:

I just got back from the hospital and was there when the doctor came into report to Steven and Keri. He spent about an hour with them and bottom line is, nothing has grown on the cultures (no bladder infection or meningitis), heart x-rays were fine, no more glucose in the urine so the kidneys are OK, and all the blood work (including metabolic disorders) turned out OK. His best guess is that she had a virus of some type (not viral meningitis, but more likely a stomach virus or something) that she may have picked up in the pediatrician’s office when she went in for repeated checks of the billirubin. We will probably never know for sure what the cause was, but we are thankful that Emma is OK. The doctor commended Steven and Keri for being very “astute” parents and bringing her into the emergency room on Friday given her symptoms. Emma is eating better today and although she isn’t quite up to par, the doctor said since they’ve ruled out everything major he would prefer to send her home to recover so she doesn’t catch anything else in the hospital environment. And we were all OK with that. :)

Words can’t express how grateful we are for all of the prayers and support. She is such a little doll and it is amazing how much you can love her in such a short amount of time!

Cindy

Quick update on my niece; please continue to pray

2009-07-12T19:56:00.000-07:00

Emma Kate came home after six days in the hospital for her jaundice. We were so thankful! However, last Friday night she was admitted to Children's Hospital after not eating for 12 hours. She's not rooting, not sucking, is lethargic, and has some other concerning symptoms. She's now had a battery of tests, including a lumbar puncture (spinal tap), to try to determine the cause. She did have some white blood cells in her spinal fluid, though the levels were not yet dangerous. Tonight will mark 48 hrs of the IV antibiotic and the fluid IV. Apparently they're very concerned with any infection less than 28 days after birth, because there's no blood/brain barrier; the infection can go everywhere. She showed interest in nursing at one point during this stay, but isn't any more, and continues to be so lethargic she barely cries.

Please pray for the doctors' wisdom and for a diagnosis--one that is easily treatable. Pray also for great peace and faith for Keri and Steven, who are handling this with so much grace. Most of all, pray for God's glory, and His good and perfect will.

On a much, much lesser note, John and I are drawing near to the 30-day mark from what would be Baden's first day of school. If we don't sell our home within the next week or so, we're probably looking at homeschooling. This is fairly overwhelming for me, and as I looked at curriculum this week, I was praying for more wisdom. On an encouraging note, we had a very positive showing today that may (or may not) result in an offer this week. We'd appreciate your prayers for God's best for our family. I must admit that my concern with Emma outweighs even this decision right now.

Thanks for praying, friends.

Please pray

2009-07-01T15:27:00.000-07:00

My new niece, Emma Kate, was rushed to the hospital today with dangerously high bilirubin levels. Please pray for the protection of her body, especially her brain, and the peace of our family. Thanks.

The negligent blogger

2009-07-01T07:03:00.000-07:00

Yes, it has taken me forever to get to our poor, neglected little blog. High points from our lives:

Corinne turned the big 2 last Wednesday, and Baden turned the big 5 (wow!) on Sunday! We had a space-themed party for Baden, and they got some really cool gifts from people who love them.

Corinne is saying things like "saw-yee!" ("sorry!") and "Okay, see ya!" She is an adorable two-year-old, and I am thrilled to have a daughter. I luh-huv putting all of that wonderfully curly hair in pigtails.

Jack looks so much like Baden did. He's finally responding to us with smiles, which is great, because otherwise he's kind of cranky.

John's brother Matt and his wife Elizabeth brought Alexander ("Xander") Mathew into the world on May 2! Elizabeth is a size 0, and Xander was 10 lbs. 2 oz.! Owwww.

My sister Keri and her husband Steven are the proud parents of Emma Kate, born two weeks early last Saturday morning! She was 7 lbs. 10 oz. and has a beautiful head of dark hair, looking like Keri's head on a Helmick body. :)

We've reduced the price on our house by, yes, $10K for quicker sale. We are simply ready to move into the new school district, and want to catch the buying season of the summer before it ends. We may move into an apartment at that point until we can find/build something that is in the location we'd like with four bedrooms and a more reasonable price. This has been a stressful time for us, and we'd appreciate your prayers for a quick sale.

My grandpa Don fell and broke his hip, but didn't seem to like rehab in the nursing home so well, so he left AMA! He's doing okay, and his spirits seem to be up when I talk to them.

Quick house/prayer update

2009-06-08T06:29:00.000-07:00

John and I have been deciding whether or not to employ a realtor with the upswing of the market and wanting to be in the Bryant district by August. We’ve started to make plans, but also started praying that we’d be able to sell it without (i.e. soon) if we could, if not simply to know what God’s wanting us to do.

Lo and behold, we had a showing yesterday, and they liked it enough to ask to bring her mother back on Thursday! Yahoo. If you would, we’d love your prayers that
a) She’d follow through with having that appointment, and that they’d want to buy
b) That God will have another home that meets our family’s needs within our price range
c) That we’ll have wisdom to know what God wants us to do, and that ultimately what He wants will happen.
Thanks.

Also, our six-week-old “Blue-eyed Jack” is becoming much more alert—I’m hoping to be grinned at this week! Has a little cold, so he’s not sleeping great at night. His mom could use your prayers that she'd honor God; not sure I'm handling all this that well.

Francis Chan: Living Safely

2009-05-17T14:17:00.001-07:00

This guy is putting forth some cool ideas into the Christian community. Thought this clip was worth the brief moment to watch it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LA_uwWPE6lQ

Latest Jack pics!

2009-05-12T12:07:00.001-07:00

Baden's been very helpful, and really embraces the big brother thing.

Audio: "Jack, these are teeth."

Looks a lot like Baden!

Will's very nurturing, and quick to rush to Jack's aid. I love it: He declares, "Don't worry, Jack! I'll protect you."

Big baby blues!

Welcome, Jack!

2009-04-27T15:16:00.000-07:00

Praise God from whom all blessings flow!!!

Announcing John ("Jack") Oliver Breitenstein, named John after father and grandfather, and Oliver meaning peace. He's weighing in at 8 lbs 12 ounces "standing" 20 3/4 inches tall.

This barrel-chested guy has thighs like a turkey leg, and huge hands! He's got bright blue eyes and a full head of dark hair, though taking in the pale brows and lashes, we might have another blondie! Taking after the whole peace (Oliver) motif, he seems pretty laid back. Jack is healthy and we're both doing great; we came home yesterday!

Thanks for all the prayers.

Pregnant with Keri!

2009-04-23T14:10:00.001-07:00

She's due July 11, and Jack's coming tomorrow!!

Last kid pics with only three!

2009-04-23T13:55:00.000-07:00

Losing the training wheels--!

Painting on the deck this afternoon; he and Will shared paintings a lot and had a blast. They were covered. After going to the park, we've had a great day.

Audio: "Wy-WEEEEE!"

Will's getting the hang of his scooter!

Baden all decked out in cowboy gear!

Jack comes TOMORROW, folks! Yahooooooo!

A few pics of our last days as a family of five...

Recent kid pics

2009-04-07T20:29:00.001-07:00

What do I say to this?

2009-04-07T20:14:00.000-07:00

I just went up to the boys' room where they are supposed to be sleeping. However, Ramona Forever on CD was playing, and I was pretty sure I knew who'd started it. He protested:

Baden: No, when Daddy came up, I said he could start Ramona over or start the quiet CD!

Mom: Oh, okay. I'm sorry, Baden. I was wrong.

Baden: C'mon, Mom! You know the husband is in charge of the wife!!

Mom (uh, momentarily at a loss for words): [Pause] You're right. And Daddy and I act as a team. But who's still in charge of you?

Baden: You're still in charge, but the husband is the in-chargest!

Good readin'

2009-03-25T09:16:00.000-07:00

My publisher/boss and I were having a great conversation about good books last night, and I thought I'd compile a brief list for others of you who consider fiction and/or memoirs a great escape. I use fiction for entertainment, to broaden my understanding of other people/times/places, to understand the market, and to appreciate great writing. (Please don't hate me if they're not you're thing. :) So please note that because of this, many of these (if not most) aren't from my own worldview.

Christ the Lord: Road to Cana (Anne Rice)
Interpreter of Maladies (Jhumpa Lahiri)
The Poisonwood Bible (Barbara Kingsolver)
Three Dog Life (Abigail Thomas—actually a memoir)
Monster (Frank Peretti; kind of pop fiction, but still an interesting read)
Dream When You’re Feeling Blue (Elizabeth Berg)
Ellen Foster (Kaye Gibbons)
Breathing Lessons (Anne Tyler)
Peace like a River (Leif Enger)
The Appeal (John Grisham)
When Crickets Cry (Charles Martin)
Some Wildflower in My Heart (Jamie Langston Turner--writing's much better than the title)
Palace Walk (Naguib Mahfouz)
Girl Meets God (Lauren Winner)
Hood (Stephen Lawhead)
Madman (Tracy Groot)
Safely Home (Randy Alcorn--a little preachy, but worth the insight into Chinese persecution)
Count of Monte Cristo (Alexander Dumas)

Happy reading!

Tips to save time and or money

2009-03-19T10:59:00.000-07:00

1) http://www.zennioptical.com/: I rave about this site. I purchase my glasses and Corinne's here. Yes, prescription lenses are included. After shipping, I paid $12.95 for mine, and about $27 for Corinne's, which are titanium and flexible to the point you could wring them out. I am dead serious about the pricing, and we received them in about 2 weeks (except when they got caught in customs...though I doubt there were any weapons of mass destruction in my glasses). Customer service requires about a 5-10 minute wait, but is good service.

Tip: You'll need your prescription (you can't get it over the phone with HIPAA, so you'd have to pick it up or have it faxed), and your pupillary distance from an optometrist, who uses a machine. I measured my own and am satisfied--they tell you how on zennioptical.com--but it was nearly impossible with Corinne and ended up affecting her vision (her optometrist was generous enough to use the machine and still let us save the $170 of getting the glasses there, but ask gently, of course).

Also, I have a wide face, so the measurements of the width of the glasses were important to me (they give all of them to you in millimeters). Might want to have your old glasses handy to test the length of the temples, etc. I mean, it's not foolproof; it's ordering online. But to me, if I spent an extra $13 in saving $170, I was okay with that!

2) Printer ink cartridges: I just saved a bundle at http://www.inkredibleinkz.com/. It’s 1-3 day shipping (free with orders over $25), satisfaction guaranteed, and I paid $20 for 5 cartridges—2 black, three color! I usually pay $40+. Beats running to Office Depot!

3) Microsoft has some tools called Power Toys that are developed by Microsoft but not supported by them, but they’re really helpful. I’ve downloaded their image resizer, and it’s a whole lot easier to use photos from my digital camera.